October 8, 2011

The Advantages of Being 40+ Weeks Pregnant

Being overdue can really suck. Let’s face it. It’s pretty much like being a kid on Christmas morning. You wake up, realize it’s Christmas, run down the stairs expecting to find all kinds of awesome, when you really find someone sitting there that says, “Hey kid, not today; but don’t be discouraged. It could happen anytime within the next two weeks.”

On my due date, Mr. BBM sent me for a 1 hour pregnancy massage. It was all kinds of wonderful. I told her to hit any accupressure points that would help bring labor on and she did. She said that if it works, it would happen within 48 hours. It’s been more than 48 hours now. . . and nothing.

In an effort to keep a positive attitude, I’ve come up with a list of advantages to being overdue. Yes, you heard me. . . advantages. Believe it or not, there are some.

No one expects pretty much anything of you. What they do expect is that you will be a complete and total couch potato. Also, frequent naps are no longer frowned upon as laziness. They are necessary. I mean, who’s really going to wake a sleeping giant, especially one who is over-due?

There’s no need to find a coaster when you’re hanging out on the couch with a good book. Your belly makes a fine table-top. Also, it’s a great book prop. If I could just get the baby to use his feet to turn the pages, I’d be in major business.

I never have to look around for the remote. In fact, it’s right under my chin, pretty much all the time.

There’s no need for a table for the popcorn when watching a movie with the family. The belly also serves as a wonderful TV tray.

No time to find a table to write on when taking a quick phone message? No problem.

You don’t need to worry about belly button lint. Heck, you don’t have to worry about even having one anymore. There’s just a funny stretched out area where the belly button used to live, sort of like the artist formerly known as Prince. The skin formerly known as a belly button. . .

You can be as grumpy and miserable as you want to be, and lash out at anyone you want to without consequences. Who’s going to argue with a pregnant person who is about to burst? Unless they’re a complete idiot, no one.

Finally, tonight I’m going to Big I’s swim meet. Think I won’t have my pick of where to sit? Leg room too? That’s right. Who would be stupid enough to sit anywhere near someone who looks like me?

Miserable? Check.

Likely to have my water break all over you? Check.

I can pretty much clear a room, or at least a section on the bleachers big enough to accommodate me and any mess I might make. Besides the mess part, there aren’t that many people who want to be near me when they might have to help deliver a baby. And I happen to like my own personal space. It’s definitely a huge advantage.

Finally, when people ask you when you’re due and you say, “two days ago,” there’s no shortage of compliments on how amazing you look. I mean, if you’re two days overdue and you’re out in public, you’re practically a super hero. It’s nice to be admired (pitied. . . whatever).

  • Print
  • email
  • RSS
  • Digg
  • del.icio.us
  • Technorati
  • StumbleUpon
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn

You might also like:

  1. Perfect Post-July
  2. 29 Weeks and One More Obstacle
  3. Pooped in More Ways than One

Posted by Black Belt Mama on October 8, 2011 in Mental Strain for Mama, Woah Baby | 4 Comments

Comments

4 Comments on The Advantages of Being 40+ Weeks Pregnant

  1. sandy smith (@27WeeksPregnant) on Sun, 9th Oct 2011 2:56 am

    2. lol i think being lazy and laying around on the couch is one of the best parts about being pregnant. I had twins that I carried a full 40 weeks, which is rare. I was so relieved when I finally delivered them. :)

  2. Michele on Sun, 9th Oct 2011 3:42 pm

    3. Oh my! I know how you feel. Erin was two weeks overdue. I stopped working on my due date. I spent the next two weeks feeling miserable while sitting on the couch. As a tween, Erin is still making me wait…late to get up in the morning, late doing her homework, last one of the school bus.

  3. Terri on Mon, 10th Oct 2011 1:47 pm

    4. You look fabulous! You can have fun teasing your little guy when he gets older.

  4. Yes, I’m STILL Pregnant | Black Belt Mama on Tue, 11th Oct 2011 7:20 pm

    5. [...] case you haven’t figured it out, I’m pretty much over the whole “advantages of being 40 + weeks pregnant” thing. The positive outlook I had post massage the other day is long gone. You try having a killer [...]

Tell me what you're thinking...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!





CAPTCHA Image
*