How To Tell If You’ve Overdone It At the Gym-Legs Edition
1. When you sink into cat stance at karate, you nearly have an unintentional seat on the floor.
2. When you try to get up from a kneeling position and find yourself going nowhere unless you push off with your hands.
3. You hold it as long as possible because the sitting and standing to go to the bathroom is damn near impossible.
4. For only the second time in your life, you truly wish you had been born a guy and could stand to pee (Totally agree with you on this one Sarah!).
5. You need to hold onto both railings with a death grip to even consider making it down the stairs without sitting and scoothing down like little kids.
6. When you have to literally pick each leg up to get in and out of the car. (This one is courtesy of Patrick Parker and I couldn't agree more.)
7. When you realize you forgot to brush your hair and the brush is upstairs, and you decide you can simply live without brushing your hair for one day (OR when the stairs seem like you're climbing Mt. Everest-courtesy of Angelica.)
8. When you realize you're walking like one of those big barrel-chested guys at the gym and it looks as though someone has shoved a bo up your butt as a new spine.
9. When you walk in the dojo thinking you're walking as close to normal as possible considering the world of pain you're experiencing and everyone asks you "What's wrong?"
10. You realize that the whimpering and whining you thought was your kids, is actually you, unconsciously whimpering with pain every time you expect your legs to carry you anywhere.
Check out The BBM Review for a giveaway just in time for Memorial Day weekend!
Why My Kitchen Should Have a Hose and a Drain in the Floor
This post was originally called "Just Don't Expect Me To Do Stairs." That was before I had to do so much more than stairs.
I worked out with my trainer last night for the first time in many weeks. I had told him a couple weeks ago that I was getting bored with my leg routine and wanted some new challenges. I felt like my knee was up for it. At the time, he talked to me about a workout he had in mind for me, but I needed to be "ready for it." I had no idea about all the new kinds of torture my trainer would be able to dream up for me.
I had no idea how a barfing child could complicate matters even further.
First, my trainer grabbed a step and a 10 lb. medicine ball. I had to start with my right foot on the step while holding the ball off to my left hip. Then I had to step up, pull my left knee up and at the same time bring the medicine ball across my body and above my head. My trainer had been telling me about the importance of compound movements like that and how it would help me with both strength and endurance.
The next set was straight squats with the heels of my feet on these squishy ball things to help with form. I had to hold a 15 lb. kettle ball out straight in front of me while squatting. The second set of these I had to hold for a count of three before coming back up. The last set? I had to hold for a count of five and he always makes me hold the last one of each set for a count of 10.
Killer.
Then it was wall sits for a minute at a time before tackling lunges. These weren't your ordinary lunges though. With a five lb weight in each hand, I had to lunge, go all the way down while lifting my arms straight out to shoulder height. He had me lunging my way across the gym and I was wondering how something that looks so simple can be so difficult. During the last set, I lunged down and didn't stop until my knee had touched the floor. My muscles simply quit on me. It was like they had a mind of their own and were screaming for mercy. I got back up though and finished the set strong. It helps when your trainer stands there and yells at you, "Get up!" on the last one. You kind of don't want to say no to the guy who can have a 30 minute conversation with you while doing non-stop pull-ups.
But the lunges weren't over. The next type of lunge was stationary while holding a 10 lb. medicine ball out in front of me and twisting my upper body in the direction of my front knee. I sucked it up through three sets although I really wanted to just lay down and whimper by this point.
We weren't done though.
Next came calf raises, leg extensions and leg curls. We did high reps for three sets, and then it was on to abs. When I was finished, an hour after the torture had begun, my trainer told me he was impressed. He said he doesn't know that many girls who can get through all of that. We checked my body fat percentage: 18.3% and BMI 19.9 and decided I was definitely on the right track.
I came home last night walking with a stagger, and I knew this morning was going to be rough. I had no idea.
I managed to get Big I up for school and out the door, but it was only thanks to a railing on either side of my stairwell that I was able to make it down the stairs without having to sit, scoot, boom, the way little kids do. I had plans to clean the house today but scrubbing the kitchen floor was not on my list of things to do. My mop broke, and since I can't kneel on my knees, mopping the floor is now a half hour of squatting and pain, and that's without having done the most intense leg workout ever the day before.
At 11:30, I got a call from Big I's school. She was in the nurse's office with a terrible stomach ache, nausea and a sore throat. I had to come get her immediately. You see, swine flu is in the next school district over from us. Four confirmed cases already, and an additional two pending but probable.
I had her home and resting comfortably within 15 minutes, with a warning from the school nurse that if she spiked a high fever, I had to take her to the doctor immediately. I was busy catching up on the phone with a friend who had called while Big I napped on the sofa. All of a sudden, there was this terrible noise, like a burp from the deep dark depths of hell and Big I came tearing out into the kitchen moaning. I started screaming for her to run as fast as she could when she stopped on a dime and let loose.
Barf on my kitchen island. Barf on my stools. Barf on my wall. Barf all over my tile floor. Barf under the table where Lil C was sitting peacefully eating her lunch.
"Oh my God! Don't move!" I screamed and hung up the phone. I should have known that barfing episodes like this don't come with just one round. I didn't want her to have to walk through the vomit to get to the bathroom, but when she started hurling again, I just told her to jump over it and get in the bathroom.
It was as I stood surveying the damage to my wall and floor (a good 10 ft trail of barf to the bathroom) that I strongly wished I would have remained working full time and let Mr. BBM stay at home with the girls full time. They usually barf at night and I am on kid duty while Mr. BBM cleans up the stuff. I can't stand cleaning up the stuff.
Meanwhile, Lil C continued to eat her lunch. How on Earth she managed that, I will never know. My stomach still threatens to reject my lunch if I even think about the puddle that was my kitchen floor two hours ago. I'll probably forgo eating the rest of the week thanks to that image and subsequent clean up.
As I cleaned up the puddles, I started dry heaving (excellent for already abused ab muscles); and my legs screamed out in pain from having to squat down.
It's now after 2:00. Big I says she's feeling a little better and is passed out on the sofa. I just finished bleaching the bathroom, and hand scrubbing the kitchen floor and have surrounded her with plastic bag lined buckets.
It took me over two hours to clean up two rooms and although I'm feeling horrible that she's so sick, I have to say that she looks rather peaceful right now, compared to the horrible burning feeling in my thighs and calves that is anything but peaceful.
How To Tell If You’ve Overdone It At The Gym
1. You lift your hand to brush your teeth and decide it would really just be easier to bring your mouth down to your hand level instead of the other way around. Who cares if your head is in the sink?
2. You see that your hair needs to be brushed, but figure that if Meg Ryan can still pull off the messy look, you can too.
3. Simply wiping off the counter is painful enough that it makes you whimper.
4. Turning the steering wheel in the car hurts, so you decide to drive home a different way so you can eliminate as many turns as possible.
5. Your first thought in the morning is that you can't wait to go to bed at night.
6. When you go to put your pajamas on at night, you decide it might just be easier to sleep in your clothes since raising your arms above shoulder height feels like people are ripping the insides of your arms apart.
7. You've decided that swinging your arms when walking is optional.
8. Little elbows pushing off of your chest reminds you of the time you got the massage from the crazy Russian lady who you thought would kill you before she solved any of your back problems.
9. You decide to make for dinner only meals that don't require you to retrieve anything from the upper cabinets.
10. You have ibuprofen as your breakfast.
How do you know you've overdone it?
The Gym Rut
Last week, I was at the dojo four nights, but I didn't once go to the gym. Ever since we did the crazy landscaping weekend, I just can't seem to get there. I'm still suffering from post landscaping exhaustion. Plus, my dragon lady holly picked a fight with me and I still have injuries related to that assault. If you've ever been around a dragon lady holly, you know this is no exaggeration.
First, I made excuses that the landscaping work was enough of a workout. And trust me, when I tell you that it was most definitely enough.
Then both the girls got sick. Big I was so sick that she was once again, "decorating" the pediatrician's parking lot. Lil C had an ear infection so bad that every other word she said was "WHAT?" and I just couldn't see taking Lil C to Kid Zone, where I just knew she'd pick up yet another germ.
Now there's swine flu. There is a confirmed case only a county away from us and seven probable cases in the same county. It's only a matter of time before it's in my front yard. This morning, I was planning on going to the gym. Then I began rationalizing.
What if someone went to Mexico or was around someone with swine flu? Then, they are around their kids, take them to KidZone. The next thing you know? We've got a gym flu epidemic. And people, if you've been hanging around here long enough, then you know that this family is prone to strange illnesses and injuries. We practically wear giant targets around our heads saying: "infect me."
As much as I'd like to go to the gym today, unless I find some latex gloves and a surgical mask, I think I'll just stay home and try to break a sweat here.
The Flu Ate My Muscles
I went to the gym on Friday for the first time in over two weeks. When a flu goes through a family, Mommy doesn't get to go to the gym. Since Lil C is still sporting a bit of a runny nose, I really didn't want to put her in the KidZone and risk another bout of typhoid illness. So, I enlisted my Mom to come watch the girls and I hit the gym in the afternoon.
Normally, upon entering the gym, I feel energized, but not on Friday. I felt tired, still worn down from the flu that turned into a cold that turned into what I think are allergy-related migraines last week (and my allergy testing appointment is still a month away). But I knew I had to get back to it. I'm going back to karate on Thursday.
I anticipated maybe a little set-back. Two weeks isn't that long though, so I didn't think it would be that bad. I was very wrong.
By the time I was finished with wall squats and toe taps on the step with weights, I was sweating like crazy. I moved onto the leg press and had to doublecheck the weight. Just two weeks ago, I was easily doing three sets of 135 without any knee pain. But today, 135 was entirely too much. I had to back off to 120 lbs for the leg press. Even that was exhausting.
I worked my way through all of my leg exercises and each time I moved from one machine to the next it was harder to walk. I felt like each step was being broken down into at least three Pinnochio like pieces. Heel-jerk-toe-jerk-swing the other leg in front. It hasn't felt that awful since I first started working out. When I finally finished torturing my legs and butt, I staggered over to the mats to do my abs workout. It was a special treat for my legs to be horizontal on a mat.
Two weeks ago, I could go through 3-4 sets of four exercises, easily. Today, I could barely make it through two of my sets on the slant board. The mat exercises were killer too. I knew I was moving at the pace of a snail during the last few of each exercise.
When I don't work out on a regular basis, my knee starts cracking and being cranky. Missing two weeks is no longer an option. I have got to find ways to get to the gym even when I'm tired, even when the girls are sick.
I made it to the gym on Sunday night and I also went yesterday. I was able to up the weights a bit and get through the abs part of the program a bit more easily this time. Yesterday, while warming up on the treadmill, I thought I'd give jogging a try.
In the 17 months of hiatus from running, my body has seemingly forgotten how to run. Each time I have tried to do it, I've been met with terrible pain and a gait that is just plain silly. Since the gym wasn't that crowded, I pumped up the speed and went for it.
For the first time in over 17 months, I was able to run. It was a wonderful feeling and I know I was grinning ear to ear the entire time. How many people have you seen on treadmills smiling? None? Well yesterday, I was one of them. That smiling while running business probably won't last.
Getting back to the flu though, I would like to invite the flu to possibly avoid eating my muscles in the future and instead shoot for some of that extra thigh I can't stand or possibly the inch of loose stomach skin from carrying two decent sized babies around for over 18 months of my life.
Back off the muscles, flu bug. I need all of the muscle I can get! This girl is heading back to the dojo tomorrow!
Thank you to Ikigai for putting up a fantastic guest post yesterday. Next week, another great martial artist will be featured here. Be sure to check back!
I also wanted to let everyone here who knew Lisa know that Karl has set up a virtual memorial service for Lisa on Saturday at 4 p.m. EST. If you're interested, head over to Karl's place and get the details.
Copyright
© Copyright 2006-2019 blackbeltmama dot com ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Follow Me
Blog Designed By
My Creations
Things You Could Care Less About
