Why Parents Need to be Involved
I found this article today and it made me so angry. A 39 year old karate school owner took sexual advantage of a 15-year old female student at his karate school. If you read the article, you’ll see that the girl was made to sign an "oath of obedience" for her training. What I want to know is this? Where were the girls parents when she was being asked to sign such a document? No daughter of mine would ever be allowed to sign such a document; and I would NEVER allow my kids to train at a place where I wasn’t allowed to watch every second.
If there is one thing I can’t stand, it’s martial artists who proclaim to uphold the values of the martial arts when their intentions are completely classless. Any adult who takes advantage of a child should rot as far as I’m concerned. This is just one of many incidents like this, where young impressionable students are taken advantage of under the guise of martial arts training. It really is a shame that there is no governing board to take care of disgusting people like this, because this certainly isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last.
As a former teacher in a public school, I had to submit to background checks and finger-printing. I’m starting to think that any type of teacher, including karate teachers, should have to undergo these types of screenings. Anyone can start up a karate school, put up inflated claims about who they are and what they know, and use it as a base for seedy behavior.
How do people like that live with themselves? I hope they throw the book at this guy, teaching others like him a much needed lesson.
Why Do We Care SO MUCH about Celebrity Butts?
In my next life, I am coming back as a man. Men don’t tear their ACL’s nearly as often as women do. Men don’t face the kind of scrutiny that Jennifer Love Hewitt is facing over her derriere.
Seriously, what is wrong with PEOPLE?
There is nothing that infuriates me more than when people take a female celebrity and start insulting her up and down because of a body part that is less than perfect. This certainly isn’t the first time. I know it won’t be the last time. News flash!!!!
NO ONE IS PERFECT! No one!
Unlike a lot of attacked celebrities, Jennifer Love-Hewitt has decided to speak up and I’m so glad she did. How I would LOVE to see the cellulite on those so critical of Love-Hewitt’s heiney; because I can pretty much guarantee you that those who are being critical have plenty of imperfections themselves.
In a society where eating disorders run rampant in the teenage population and beyond, news stories like this drive me insane. We have young girls getting nose jobs, botox injections, and subjecting themselves to all kinds of risky procedures to be more "beautiful" in the eyes of society. As the mother of two daughters, I am sick about how we dissect womens bodies every single day in the media. People need to realize that the gross majority of pictures in magazines are airbrushed, photo shopped and manipulated to make women look flawless. No one is flawless.
***When you calm down after reading this rant, be sure to visit The BBM Review. Leave a comment on the Baby Jamz post and you’re entered to win a new toy!
Thankful to live in the USA
Have you seen this? (and this version of the same news report?) A 19-year old woman in Saudi Arabia was gang raped by seven men. Because she was in a car with a male who was not her relative, but rather a student she used to know, she is being punished with six months in jail and 200 lashes. She will be permanently scarred from those lashes, not like being gang-raped by seven men wouldn’t be scarring enough or anything. I should also mention the number of lashes was doubled when she went to the media to try to get help.
It’s when I read about things like this, that it makes me appreciate how lucky I am to live in the country that I do. We’re not perfect here. We have problems with womens issues and we certainly have issues with rape here too. But I doubt there is a single person in this country who thinks that a victim of gang-rape by seven men needs any additional punishment for her so-called "crime."
When I was in graduate school, I used to tutor three master’s level students from Saudi Arabia. I helped them as an ESL (English as a Second Language) tutor. We would often sit and have long conversations about Saudi Arabia and what life was like there. One of my students told me that there was virtually no crime there because those who steal lose their hands, quite a deterrent for a shop-lifter. While it’s all fine and good that their robbery rates may be lower, the media is often reporting vicious rapes that punish the victims. We also hear about honor killings where families believe that once a woman has been raped, it’s their responsibility to kill their own family member to restore honor to their family.
It’s this warped kind of thinking that infuriates me. It shows a complete lack of respect for women. It shows a complete inability to empathize with a victim. It gives men free reign to do whatever they want to the poor women who live in countries with ridiculous laws like these, because women don’t want to report the crime for fear that they’ll be given lashes and jail time as well, if not worse. While the men in the Saudi Arabia incident are being punished with jail time, what they’re doing to the woman is nothing short of disgusting. They are taking a young victim of a violent crime and further destroying her.
For those who might say that it’s none of our business what they are doing in Saudi Arabia and other countries that buy into this ridiculous mind set, I couldn’t disagree more. What they’re doing to that woman and others like her is a crime that should concern us all. It’s a crime against human decency.
Edited to add: Al Jazeera states in their article covering this issue, that the male friend of the rape victim was also raped by the men. He too, received 90 lashes. While the US papers are reporting that the rapists have been sentenced to five years in prison, Al Jazeera states that the men are receiving 1-5 years in jail. Big difference. All parties are receiving lashes. Click on the second link above to read the full story. My point is that the sentencing the victims to lashes is ludicrous!
How to Make a Head McExplode
McDonald’s is our once a week, Mommy-can’t-take-being-a-short-order-chef-anymore, treat. Despite the fact that Big I is professing her undying devotion to vegetarianism these days, she will still make an exception for chicken mcnuggets, and I’m happy to oblige. We usually do this "treat" on one of our karate days.
It’s no secret that you’re not going to get 5-star service when you go to McDonald’s; but one would think, that with all the technology, they could get at least most things about your order correct.
Today, I ordered two chicken nugget happy meals and a Big & Tasty meal. I got my meal large-sized because I’m a pig like that I share fries with the kids. Just go with it. I was impressed because the girl even asked me what kind of sauce we wanted for the nuggets. That rarely happens.
Just as the girl was saying "Thank you and pull around to window two" I noticed that they had my meal on the screen as medium sized. Before I pulled up, I asked her if she could change it to large-sized and she said it wasn’t a problem.
I should have known better.
I pulled up to the window, handed my credit card to the girl and she ran it through. She handed me my receipt. If I had known that upsizing my meal was going to cost an additional $6, I would have told her to forget it. A quick scan of the receipt showed that they had charged me for two Big & Tasty meals.
I showed her the receipt and she went to get her manager. The manager took my credit card back, and refunded my money. She also apologized profusely. It was really no big deal. Besides, I was too busy breaking up a brawl in the back seat to really care too much.
Then the girl started handing me my drinks. Two chocolate milks and a large diet coke, along with two kids and a bag from Staples, complete with a very sore wrist, make for a very stressed mama. I asked for a drink carrier. Why did I have to ask for one? If you’re giving more than two drinks and there are only little hands to help, offer a drink carrier! It’s not that hard!
Still I stayed nice. McDonald’s was giving my kitchen the night off. I was still somewhat happy.
The girl handed me my drink carrier, and three bags. I quickly checked the happy meals and saw the appropriate items. Then, after already pulling away from the window, I quickly checked my meal. There was no Big & Tasty to be found, only a grilled chicken club sandwich in its place. I quickly ran in and asked for my Big & Tasty. Instead of exchanging my sandwiches they just told me to keep both.
I went back out to the car and home.
Upon arriving home, the girls and I were getting set up, and guess what?
No sauce.
No napkins.
No straws.
The good news is that when I pulled the receipt out, the manager had taken off not one, but two Big & Tasty burgers from my receipt which means that I got my burger and the chicken club for free. However, I’m going to consider it my reward for having to put up with the whining that ensured when the girls realized they had no sauce or straws, and also as repayment for all of the forgotten nuggets, sauces, and chocolate milks of days gone by.
Next time I think I want to go to McDonald’s, maybe I’ll just stay home and bang my head on a wall instead.
***The latest review is up at The BBM Review. If you’re a martial artist, you won’t want to miss this review, which tells you how you can get authentic kobudo weapons. This is another debut by one of the writers for The BBM Review so go and give him some love. (I’ll be adding my own review when I get my custom made purpleheart tunfa in a few weeks. Woo hoo!)
Like a Sore Thumb
Filed under: Mental Strain for Mama, Things that get my gi all in a bunch
I recognized him instantly and it sent a chill down my spine. He stood there with a grocery basket in my grocery store. He wore a black baseball hat, a baggy t-shirt to match, and held an unlit cigarette in his hand. He stood apart from everyone else in the store. Instinctively, I held Lil C a little closer to me and was happy I hadn’t stuck her immediately in the truck cart.
I made sure to make eye contact with him. I wanted to send him a message that I knew exactly who he was, and that I am no one to be messed with. It wasn’t just my paranoia. My husband recognized him instantly too. After we were out of earshot, we both spoke at the same time, "That was definitely him."
About a month ago, I got an email from Family Watchdog. I had registered with them a while ago. Their site offers information on how to keep your children safe. They also offer notifications when a sex offender moves into your area. I have 111 sex offenders living in my area, but this email greatly disturbed me. This sex offender had moved .4 miles from my house, on the same street that I live on.
I was able to see his picture and some of the details of his arrest. When I took a walk with the girls a few days later, I realized that we often walk right past his apartment. It made me sick. I can deal with it when they live a few miles away, but within a few minutes walking distance is just entirely too close for comfort.
I don’t believe that sex offenders can be rehabilitated, especially those who go after children. People who go after minors have serious mental problems that can not be solved by a short jail sentence. I know all the issues with full jails, but I don’t think that convicted sex offenders should see the light of day. Why should I have to trust that they will treat me and my children with respect, when they have already shown once that they can’t?
I once read a research study somewhere that said that those who commit sexual assault are likely to be repeat offenders. My sister used to work with sex offenders. One day, one of the sex offenders attacked one of her co-workers. Once they’ve done it once, they will do it again. It’s only a matter of time and opportunity.
I know that they are walking amongst us all, but to recognize one of them so clearly in my own grocery store was so unsettling. I think about how I used to play outside for hours at a time when I was a little girl. My girls are under constant supervision when they’re outside. My parents never really talked to me about "bad people" when I was little. Sure, I got the "don’t talk to strangers" that every kid gets; but I have already had in depth conversations with Big I about what makes a good person, what makes a bad or dangerous person, and how she needs to handle herself if she’s unsure.
There are arguments that the problem is no worse today than it was years ago, and that crimes involving sexual attacks are picked up and blown up by the media. But it’s hard to deny that there’s a serious problem when you go to Family Watchdog, type in your address, and watch the screen light up with colored dots showing where convicted sex offenders live and work, within minutes of your home. When they’re also shopping at your grocery store, alongside you and your family, it really hits home.
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