Inventions, Well Wishes and Free Cash
Last night, Lil C came into our room four times. That's in addition to the five times she came out of her room before she fell asleep. I know she's stuffed up and is having trouble breathing but enough already. Between Mr. BBM snoring and Lil C visiting, I am getting next to no sleep. Lil C then crawled into bed with me this morning and spent two hours touching my face and arm and driving me absolutely insane. Finally, she fell back asleep and is now snoring louder than Mr. BBM has ever snored (Ok, maybe not quite that loud). Clearly she gets that trait from his side of the family.
Big I is looking and feeling much better today. However, she still has a low-grade fever that just won't quit and she says her headache is better but still lingering. I know she's feeling better because she "invented" a white board made out of a piece of notebook paper and a plastic storage bag. Now she's working on creating an eraser. Once she's done that, it's on to the 10 page packet that came home from school yesterday. I feel like I've been homeschooling her the entire week. Now I know why I don't do that. I'd like to state for the record that I personally despise "New Math." It's just wrong. I spent much of this week teaching Big I to check her answers with "old math" which worked just fine for me growing up. Funny that now she gets it. Grr.
I spent last night camped out on the sofa watching DVR'd episodes of "Flash Forward" which is an absolutely brilliant show. If you haven't watched it yet, I strongly recommend you find it online and get caught up. If you're a "Lost" addict like I am, you will love it. I also watched last night's episode of "Project Runway" and I would just like to warn Irina that if she ever runs into me on the street, I'm probably going to slap her or step on her foot or possibly trip her. She is such a jerk. Whatever happened to being so confident that you didn't have to insult other people? Ugh, she's just awful. I hope Carol Hannah wins, just to spite her.
In other news, my karate instructor had hand surgery yesterday for the second time. I know she's at home right now, probably trying to breathe away the pain and doing wonderfully at it, so please send positive thoughts to Mrs. H for tolerable pain and a quick recovery. We will miss you in the dojo Mrs. H! Actually I miss myself in the dojo too. Next week I'm going to try to work on actually getting there twice in one week.
Finally, a bit of good news to share. I'm giving away a $100 Visa card over at The BBM Review. Go check out the Sonicare review and follow the directions for a chance to win the card or a Sonicare Prize package. If you twitter about it or blog about it and leave a link in the comments, you get an extra entry too and who couldn't use an extra $100 these days?
Finally, if you haven't checked out my latest fantasy football column, that's where the laughs are located. Go visit Bulls N Balls and see for yourself.
Have a wonderful, swine flu free, weekend!
On Pooping Animals
After spending some time around some very large horses this weekend at a Family Fall festival, Lil C told me she might like to switch her Halloween costume from a mermaid to a horse or maybe a camel. As we were brainstorming how we could create such a costume, I told her she would have to carry around brown marshmallows and drop a few every couple feet to mimic horse/camel poop.
Both girls thought this was hysterical. Poop, when kids are this age, is always funny. We've been seeing a whole lot of pooping lately after a visit to the zoo and the fall festival.
Then Lil C made it even more funny, "Yeah, then I could pick up those marshmallows and eat them" she giggled.
We definitely spent too much time hanging around at the gorilla exhibit at the zoo last weekend. Entirely too much time.
Awesome Is as Awesome Does
When you can make the result of an airplane cookie cutter look like a mermaid for Lil C's "Under the Sea" party this weekend. . . you're pretty awesome.
When you're in solid second place in one fantasy football league. . . you're pretty awesome.
When you're in dead last in another league. . .
If you're in the same boat, you should go commiserate with me here.
Everything AND the Kitchen Sink
Yesterday Lil C and I made about eight dozen cookies for her birthday party this weekend. Today, I got home from campus and got to work. I made about 80 chicken rolls, chopped up all my vegetables, made loaves of bread shaped like starfish for a vegetable dip bread bowl, made icing to decorate those eight dozen cookies, and got the girls and my Mom to decorate all of the cookies.
As I sat down after dinner tonight to take a breather, my under-mounted kitchen sink dropped completely out of its place. Mr. BBM and I sprang into action, him holding the sink up, and me trying to get everything out from underneath it while we both tried to figure out how to prop the thing up so the pipes and garbage disposal wouldn't break. Mr. BBM eventually got a tri-pod to hold it up; and then I freaked out.
How the hell am I going to get ready for a party on Saturday when I'm expecting about 50 people. . . without a sink?
I told Mr. BBM to call every number we had for our counter-top/sink people and he did, each message becoming more frantic as I said in the background, "We don't want to SCHEDULE AN APPOINTMENT! WE NEED THEM HERE NOW! TONIGHT!"
Within a few minutes, we had a call back and they are coming tomorrow morning. I should be able to use my sink in about an hour, they said. Apparently if the plumber doesn't let it sit long enough, it can mess with the seal. Also, the board that was supposed to hold our sink up in case of the seal failing was barely screwed into the cabinet. That will get fixed tomorrow too.
With any luck, they'll be here bright and early as planned, and I won't have to wash dishes in my clothes washer or perhaps my jacuzzi tub in preparation for and at this birthday party.
On Closing That Door
Filed under: Growing Pains, Mental Strain for Mama
When you have a plan in your head of what your life is going to be like, it's sometimes difficult when things don't turn out quite like you had planned. At one point in my life, I wanted to be a lawyer. I thought, at the time, that I was too busy for kids. My husband would be the stay-at-home parent and I would be the bread-winner. When my political science class didn't go as planned, I trashed that plan and only occasionally look back and wish I had that law degree. I'd never wish not to stay home with my kids though. That change to plans is one I don't ever question.
When Mr. BBM and I started our family, I set out with the intention of having three children. I didn't care if they were girls or boys. I just wanted three. Mr. BBM is one of three children and I loved the feeling of an extra sibling in the house. I grew up with just me and my sister.
But when I was a couple months pregnant with Lil C, I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. Suddenly I was regretting my decision to even have a second child. For some people, gestational diabetes isn't a big deal, but for me, I knew it could be potentially devastating.
When my Mom was pregnant with her second child, she got gestational diabetes too. Hers, however, did not go away. My Mom is a Type 1 diabetic with an insulin pump and has been for the past 30 years. Growing up, I would come home to find her unconscious sometimes, having gone into insulin shock from a very low blood sugar. She was in a serious car accident one time from another low blood sugar. The life of insulin shots and constant blood sugar monitoring was not one I wanted.
I spent my entire pregnancy fluctuating between being excited about the baby and just wanting the baby out so I could (hopefully) stop being a diabetic. Thankfully, my diabetes went away after pregnancy. I felt like I was granted a reprieve and so did my Mom.
My plans to have a third were shattered. Taking the chance of the gestational diabetes coming back and staying seemed too great. Did I really want to subject my kids to some of the things I dealt with growing up? The answer was a definite "no." My Mom, an RN, felt the same. "Don't take that chance. Don't do it" she's told me on more than one occasion.
So with plans for a third gone, the question of why I was keeping all this baby stuff kept coming up. I have a basement full of beautiful baby clothes and bassinets. Things I won't use again, but I can't seem to part with. Mr. BBM doesn't get it and just wants the stuff gone. For me, each little piece of clothing holds so many memories. They are physical pieces of my children's baby years that seem to bring me closer to that time in my life when I had a baby on my hip. Maybe it's because Mr. BBM has always worked full time and he wasn't here nearly as much as I was with them. But no matter what he thinks or feels about it, it's difficult for me to say "I'm done" and get rid of the things that represent a time I so loved.
I don't know what made me do it today, a week before Lil C turns four, I guess it was because I know she'll be getting some new clothes for her birthday and I needed to make room. Cleaning out the things from her closet that she wore in the past year didn't seem so hard. I kept a couple items that were her favorites (or mine) and put the rest in bags for her friends. She was happy to help me. I figured since that had gone so well, I'd go through some 12-18 month stuff for my neighbor, a little girl I adore.
While going through the containers, I had the hardest time. I had to keep stopping and taking a deep breath. I'd put something on the pile to give away and then decide I just couldn't do it. It was the closest thing to torture I think I've ever experienced. I did it though, and made my way through the three containers. I parted with about 40% of it and that was a huge accomplishment for me.
Because I knew that if it stayed here for one more minute, it wasn't going to happen, I immediately went down the street to deliver it. It was when my friend looked kindly at me and said, "Are you sure?" that I lost it.
I have two healthy children and came out of a scary pregnancy unscathed, but wanting another little person in your house and not being able to have it is devastating emotionally. During the day to day, when you can occupy yourself with other things, it's not a problem. But when you force yourself to go through these things and get rid of what represents what you wanted your family to be and it won't be. . . When you're taking steps that say you've accepted that you're finished with that part of your life. . . it's just really, really, hard.
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