August 4, 2011

The Best Parents Ever

One of the serious negatives about being pregnant and anemic at the same time is that it is sometimes very difficult to find energy to do much of anything. I’m not much of a sitting around type of girl, but lately, that’s about the only thing I’m capable of comfortably doing. Thanks to a healthy infusion of green leafy vegetables, edamame and more red meat than you can find at your local butcher, I started feeling a little better this week; but there are still moments when lifting my arms is just way too intense. Mr. BBM did bring home a nice big bottle of Floradix for me last night. If you’re not familiar, it’s basically a bottle of liquid iron. It says it has lots of fruit juice in it to hide the nastiness, but it tastes like something a vampire would very much enjoy. Imagine having about five teeth knocked out at once to a gush of blood and throw in a chaser of rusty nails. . . it actually tastes worse than that. You should also avoid taking it in the evenings; I found out the hard way last night. The last thing you want to do after taking a shot of that business is get horizontal. After it goes down, you want it to stay down. Trust me.

Due to all this hanging out on the couch time that I’ve been doing lately, the girls have been subjected to a bit more TV than usual. Thanks to our crazy schedule this summer, we haven’t watched very much TV at all; but I have found two shows that are capable of bringing our family together like no other shows have done before: Supernanny and Toddlers and Tiaras.

Supernanny is the show that Sassy lovingly refers to as “that bad kid show,” and boy, there are some bad ones on there. Last week, there was a show that featured a little boy, about Sassy’s age, who would get ticked off and then run out of the house towards the street. He also spent a good deal of time hitting his Mom, calling her swear words, and spitting at people. Sassy and Big I sat mesmerized by this kid. You could have heard a pin drop in our house. Frequently, after an especially horrible outburst by the little demon, Sassy would look at me and say, “I would NEVER do that to you.”

Frequently, the parents on those shows are as messed up and insane as the kids, so I will often get a “You’re the BEST Mommy” during the course of us watching that show too. Last week, Sassy cuddled up right next to me and was wrapping her arms around me the whole time. Bad kids seriously freak her out. It’s amazing how much better behaved and how much more helpful the girls are after watching an episode of Supernanny. I kind of think it’s going to become a staple here in our house when I need them to listen better.

The other show that happened to come on yesterday afternoon is Toddlers and Tiaras. This show had both of my girls staring dumbfounded at the TV. The kids are over the top; the parents are absolute nightmares. One parents sat there directly in front of her daughter, clearly disappointed and livid that her daughter had won the “Natural Beauty” part of the pageant instead of the “Glitz” part of the pageant. Hmm, let’s see. Would I be happier if my daughter won an award for looking the way she’s supposed to look or for looking like a total hussy? It’s sort of a no-brainer. Meanwhile, the Mom sat there in a t-shirt that was too big for her, wearing a ponytail that made her look like she just rolled out of bed, scowling with disgust at her daughter, the judges and the other contestants. Talk about a group of people who need the Supernanny!

Big I was in absolute awe. “Sassy, we have the BEST parents ever. We are SO lucky,” she said to her sister. Sassy answered that with a big hug for me. Then Big I talked about earning trophies this summer for swimming, not for putting on fake eyelashes and teasing her hair, and how good it felt to work hard at something and get a trophy that truly means something. It was a proud parenting moment, followed by two kids who immediately got in their pajamas when I told them it was time, the first time.

Yep, reality TV is capable of giving even young children a healthy appreciation for the awesome parents they have at home. I think they are partially afraid I’ll put them in a glitz pageant or call the Supernanny if they don’t listen to me too. Whatever works.