February 25, 2011

Too Much to Ask?

On the day I found out I was pregnant, one of the first thoughts that popped into my mind was coffee. How would I live without coffee to get me through the morning and the rest of the day. Sometimes, on days when I'm up really early, I need that afternoon blast to get me through evening swim practice. Mr. BBM looked up the recommended daily caffeine intake and told me I could still have a cup a day. I did that for the first two days. The next day, I woke up and the smell of coffee made me feel like I had to hurl, instantly.

We have a house with a very open floor plan and the smells from the kitchen go straight up to my room. I wasn't even awake yet, and I felt sick. Giving up coffee would not be a problem.

The problem though, is that Mr. BBM has not given up coffee. On weekends and on the two days a week that he works from home, the house reeks of it and I can hardly stand it. On the mornings when no coffee is made, I feel better. I can get through my day better. During each and every pregnancy, I've had a horrible time with smells and this one is no different. I can smell someone smoking in a car 14 cars in front of me on a highway. I can smell body odor from a quarter mile away (which made teaching high school really difficult, back in the day). Even perfume, body washes and fabric softener can send me over the edge. It's similar to the reaction Mr. Cullen has to a werewolf. It's repulsive and it turns my stomach upside down.

This morning I woke up and instantly smelled the coffee. It made me reel. I haven't actually puked yet, but this morning is the closest I've been so far. I had to stand in the bathroom and decide whether or not it was safe for me to leave the room. My mouth was watering something fierce.

The problem with the whole coffee thing is that Mr. BBM doesn't get it. I've asked him to make the coffee in the garage or even in the basement. I have hinted that the smell of tea doesn't make me nauseated. Would it be too much to ask him to switch or stop for a bit? Am I being unreasonable?

Whenever I start to think that I am, I think about this: here I am, after celebrating many 29th birthday anniversaries, pregnant with number three. This body, that I've been working so hard on, to get in shape, to get flat abs, is changing already. Parts of me are becoming softer; parts are becoming bigger. Soon, I'll have a visible belly and it will only get bigger. Those abs I've been working so hard on. . . back to the drawing board.

I've given up caffeine which means I can't even have a soda unless I'm at home. No restaurants have caffeine free diet anything. I've given up my Thursday night "Wine & Whine" night with my neighbor. And trust me when I tell you that it's not the same when you're sipping water.

In the fall, I won't be able to teach my classes because I'll be giving birth and nursing a newborn. The spring semester might not work out either. When you're nursing, it's a full time job.

I've felt nauseated for the past two weeks and have found it difficult to eat any type of food more than once. I'm seriously running out of options. Because of having gestational diabetes last time, I've already put myself on the gestational diabetes diet, which means I'm counting carbs at each and every meal and snack. Do you know how much fun it is to count out exactly 18 potato chips when that's all you're craving? Or 1/2 cup of pasta. It's not fun.

Things have drastically changed for me in the past few weeks and the changes to come will be even more grand. I asked Mr. BBM how his life has changed and he said that he will have another mouth to feed, another child to support. But actually, for the first year, all that feeding pretty much comes from me anyway.

I'm not complaining about all the changes that are already happening and the ones to come. I've been through this before. I know it's part of the process and that the reward is amazing. . . but is it too much to ask that Mr. BBM gives up the coffee, at least until I'm not feeling so sick?

Am I being unreasonable???

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Posted by on February 25, 2011 in Mental Strain for Mama | 5 Comments

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