December 2, 2010

T-Rex Arms and Sipping Wine Through Straws

Yesterday was a fantastic day for me. First, I reunited with my awesome personal trainer. I have never met anyone who is able to motivate me the way that he does. He's also really good at catching weights as my spaghetti arms drift them slowly and awkwardly towards my face while on that incline bench. Yesterday, he saved me thousands in dental bills.

My legs can kick any of your butts; but I admit I have neglected my arms severely. Severely.

Jamie took me through a work out yesterday that was ridiculous. I knew 10 minutes into it that I was going to be hurting today. Hurting doesn't even really begin to describe it. I woke up this morning and thought I was going to need assistance in getting my pajama top off to get in the shower. Then, when I had successfully completed that hurdle, I realized that washing my hair was going to be no small feat. I lathered up my hands and bent my head down as far as I could to eliminate the need to raise my arms above waist height. That was difficult. So, I attempted to wash my hair with the insides of my elbows because it just isn't possible for me to lift my arms and bend them today. Not gonna happen.

When I got out of the shower, I realized that holding the hair dryer was going to seriously suck. I just accepted that it was going to be a bad hair day and got on with it.

When I arrived on campus for my very last classes of the semester this morning, I had lots to write on the white board. Usually I use my go-go-gadget arms to write at the top of the board, but today I wrote at the very bottom. I could tell my students knew something was up so I explained to them that my arms, when bent, feel like they have opposing magnets in them. "Do you hear that?" I asked them. "Every time I bend my arms, my triceps scream "no!"

They laughed, and then got quiet when they heard my triceps actually scream, just like I said they were doing.

They cracked up even harder when I told them I was feeling kind of like a T-Rex as I swung my arms around while keeping my elbows low and tight into my body. When class was over, getting my coat on took a while and really hurt too. It was then that I realized I had collected about 45 full and huge portfolios and there was no way I was going to be able to make it to my car without pain. Thank you to that wonderful young man who just so happened to be coming into my classroom for the next class, who grabbed a stack of them and helped me to my car. Bless you, young man. There is a special place in heaven for people like you.

In addition to getting back on the training wagon again, I received a delightful email from BlogHer's syndication editor last night. Today, my post is live on BlogHer's front page. I have pitched my writing many times to various people and I have never been successful from a query. However, I am more than happy to allow posts I write to be "discovered" as this one and some others were a while back. It is really nice to actually get paid for writing something; and despite what many of you may think, it is really nice to have arms that are too sore to lift once again. I'm motivated and happy and it's a super nice feeling, even if I'm going to have to sip my celebratory wine through a straw because my arms are just too darn sore to lift anything, even wine.