February 16, 2010

Wipe Out

This morning I expected to see a bunch of snow on the ground again but we only got a light dusting. I left a little early for campus, wanting to get to the classroom a couple minutes early to get my powerpoint presentation up and ready.

I arrived on campus 10 minutes early and got out of my car. The parking lot wasn't even coated with snow, except for one area. I incorrectly assumed that it was just snow and walked at a decent pace right onto an ice arena of hell.

It was a banana split fall of epic proportions.

My right foot was on the ground one second, and the next it was flying straight up in the air in front of me. I heard myself say "Woah" and then I took the name of the Lord in vain as I slammed onto the ice. . . hard.

Two teachers walking about 10 feet in front of me stopped and asked me if I was ok. A car behind me in the parking lot stopped and a girl actually got out of the driver's side to ask if I was ok. Turns out she was one of my students.

Perfect.

I got back to my feet, said I was fine and then I looked at my hands as another faculty member brushed off my icy butt. I had two bloody hands and the one was dripping pretty good.

I slowly made my way into the building where I teach and followed the one woman to financial aid where she outfitted me with first aid cream and bandaids.

I arrived two minutes late to my class. My student who had witnessed the fall had a look of concern on her face. "Oh my God," she said, "Are you OK?"

I assured her that as soon as I got my hand to stop bleeding I would be fine. And then I did what any good teacher does. I poked fun at myself throughout the class and used the topic of falling on your butt in public as a speech topic. Sometimes, when God knows you're lacking material or motivation, he finds a way to give you some I guess. That God is a funny dude sometimes.

A couple hours later, my hands are cut up and my right hand is extremely sore. My butt is also feeling a bit cranky, but apparently I did a decent breakfall. I smacked my hands on the ground with such force that I ripped them up a bit. But I didn't land on my elbows, wrists, or horror of all horrors, my head.

And I managed to keep my open school bag that was already threatening to spill pre-fall, and purse on my shoulder the whole time. Clearly, I am talented.

Clearly.