May 26, 2009

The Dojo Family

I am frequently asked how a beginner should go about choosing a dojo. I've written about it in the past and you can find those tips here. But while you can certainly research the lineage of a style, hang around for a couple classes to observe and ask people who go there and who've gone there in the past, there's really no way of knowing if the people at your dojo are going to be merely people you see a couple times a week while you train, or if they'll become more than that-part of your dojo "family."

I consider myself extremely fortunate to train at an awesome dojo with a great dojo family. While the green belts and above obviously spend more time together, there seems to be no separation between ranks when it comes to helpful attitudes and friendliness.

A couple weeks ago, I organized a hibachi dinner followed by dessert back at my house afterward and the guest list kept growing. The amazing thing about everyone is that we have a drastic age range but it doesn't seem to matter. We have the single 20-something guys, the married 30 and 40 year old crew, and our instructors whose ages will remain quiet because I'd like them to still talk to me.

I've heard of dojos where the instructors won't associate with the students outside of the dojo, but in our dojo, that's simply not the case. Our hibachi dinner a few weeks ago ranged from 1st kyu brown belt up to 9th degree black belt; and we had a blast. I hope our next event (we're thinking tiki bar) will be even more well attended than last time. (I seem to have become the social coordinator so I better get on that before I lose my role.)

Now that I am back and my knee is feeling strong, I am even more grateful for my friends at karate. I truly do believe that they helped get me through my injury. I looked at one of our green belts who was going through chemo and still coming to the dojo each week; and I thought, "Wow, if he can come back, I can come back too." He's now cancer free, on the verge of becoming a brown belt, and serves as a training inspiration to us all.

When I was having a particularly rough time after my surgery and feeling like I would never feel better, I had a visit from a dojo friend that gave me new determination and motivation to get better. Simply being around these people makes you want to be better and work harder.

During my time away, I kept in touch by being in the dojo from time to time and via email. Before I came back and during my first few weeks, there were times when I felt like leaving karate was going to be my only option. It felt unnatural and like I was taking an unnecessary risk with my newly reconstructed ACL. But one of the main things that kept me going is that I didn't want to lose that connection with the people who've gone beyond being my training mates-they're my friends.

Last night, I worked with four different people on various bunkai I've been working on. Each one of them helped and contributed in a different way and I've been more than happy to help them right back. We seem to have an incredible group dynamic where everyone just wants everyone else to succeed and get better at what we're doing. The competitive aspects that you sometimes hear about between individuals don't seem to exist in our dojo.

So what's the point of this post, other than to put something up because I've had some serious writer's block lately? I guess it's to say "thank you" to all my training friends at the dojo. I wouldn't be where I am now if it wasn't for your help.