This sounds like a very interesting book.
One of the most important aspects of my training – and one that I have tried to instill in my 11 year old daughter – is that you must be willing to do “the unthinkable” if it will save your life.
My daughter balks at the idea of jamming her thumbs into an attackers eyes, but if that’s going to keep her from being abducted or raped some day, I can only hope that she is able to put her normal aversion to hurting someone else aside.
I don’t want to sound like I’m advocating the society wide desensitizing of violence that we are seeing with our culture’s choices for entertainment… but as someone who has trained the ability to defend my safety up to and including taking an attacker’s life, I think an important aspect of self-defense is to be able to reach that mindset.
My compassion for an attacker only extends far enough to do no more damage than necessary to ensure that I stay safe.

Steve: I’m not saying, and I don’t think Grossman is either, that playing video games or watching violent movies turns people into murderers. But you can’t deny that seeing violent things and continual exposure desensitizes people to violence. It’s been proven time and time again. It’s the exact same thing with rapists. No one views pornography and goes out and decides they’re going to rape someone tomorrow; it’s not an instant brainwashing. However, over time, there is certainly a progression of violence that is correlated to exposure to violence and sexually objectifying media. I think it’s especially relevant when we see the media glorifying certain types of behavior, violence included. Grossman talks in his book about the movies people were exposed to 20-30 years ago as opposed to now. There’s a huge difference. We see many more vigilante type plots these days and people “taking matters into their own hands.” The media influences viewers in many ways, this being just one small example.
Wayne: One of the things that I didn’t bring up in the post, but that it made me think about while reading is exactly what you’re talking about. We often hear about women in particular not being able to hurt their attackers because they can’t bring themselves to hurt another person (even when that person is a rapist and worse). What the book made me realize is that the not being able to hurt someone isn’t necessarily a female trait, but instead a human trait. I agree with you that as a martial artist, one has to be able to train to overcome this. Grossman describes a couple different techniques used by martial artists in the book that are graphic and seemingly would be effective in achieving that mindset if the situation warrants it.

I agree with Steve. Rape is all about power and control.
As a 20-year veteran, I saw a lot more violence than I ever wanted to see and the truth is that it affects you. Up close and personal is way worse than seeing any video of it.
As a society, we have conditioned ourselves to realize that video games, movies and television aren’t real life. News clips, on the other hand, affect us almost as much as the up close and personal contact.
I don’t agree with the stats in the book. My father was in WWII and he didn’t see soldiers holding back. Even so, the enemy was still defeated if even by machinery instead of individually.

I have the distinct ‘pleasure’ of growing up, well – right now – and think my perspective is just a little bit different then people even from the generation before mine.
Everyone here is right, of course. No, video games don’t create murders, but violence is accepted far too easily. What BBM said is right – it effects you, and there is no way you can deny that. I don’t think many people realize HOW much effect it has on young kids today. No, many don’t become dangerous, perhaps – but they (we) become so used to violence it can’t be good. I know countless boys and girls around my age (I’m 19, by the way) who play astoundingly violent games constantly. And it really IS scary. Some have serious issues of their own, and their violent potential is acted out very disturbingly when they play. I don’t think it CAN be viewed as JUST a game. By playing so realistically at death, it makes it almost easier to deal with, and accept, and even commit.
Murder, violence – teens, at least the ones where I’ve lived, joke at murder, but more than that, ARE more violent. My father tells me that when he was growing up most of the students in the school kept a gun in their car, and there was never a problem. He’d never heard of a school shooting. Today, my classmates are stabbed in the hallways, kids are shot blocks from school, our schools are closed from bomb and school shooting threats. Kids DIE. They KILL each OTHER. And, yes, I went to the poorer ‘ghetto’ schools, where violence was perhaps more commonplace than one in a nicer neighborhood – but not that much more. And they say it doesn’t effect you. That we’re not growing more violent.
Maybe, even though I’m a teen, I’m overly sensitive – I’d give you that – but by PLAYING at very REAL violence, it gives action to anger, direction and thought to what might be only ideas. It’s not exactly the same as ‘cowboys and indians.’ The images – not just on games but on TV and movies – make it almost more accepted, normal. Like BBM said, over time it creates a more violent society – and a society that accepts more violence. I think that’s the worst part – that it’s looked at as so NORMAL. That it doesn’t SHOCK.
I honestly think my generation is more dangerous than any before.
And as a side note, as a martial artist, you’re right – we’re trying to train ourselves to BE desensitized to violence, in that we don’t balk when faced with a situation where we might need it. God-willing, we’ll never face that situation, but the way the world is going… But that desensitization is almost good. Because most people DO balk at truly hurting others – thank goodness – and by not fearing and freezing we can, at least, gain that advantage and have more of a chance of defending ourselves from people who don’t.
Excellent post. I’ve got to read that book.

Although most people would agree that violence in the media can help to desensitize people, I also believe that it can have the reverse effect as well. The types of movies and books that take a more realistic close-up view to the violence such as Braveheart, Saving Private Ryan, Schindler’s List, and Band of Brothers, to name a few, allows the viewer to share in the emotions of the characters. For me, this type of media violence can turn my stomach, make me angry, or bring a tear to my eye. It makes me think of things like “how far would I go to save my own life”, “would I be able to take someone else’s life”, and “would I be able to sacrifice my own life to save someone else”. I believe that people should be exposed to some of these violent materials so that they can get a better appreciation of what violence can lead to instead of just playing games where the object is to kill as many people as you can, and if your character dies you can just hit the reset button and start over again. If children are exposed to these more realistic depictions of violence, in a safe environment where the child can discuss things they see with an adult of course, then hopefully they would be more hesitant to do something violent until the time came when it is necessary.

I think society has become desensitized to violence. Popular culture seems to glorify murder and mayhem as if it were a joke. And yet violence is supposedly on the decline on a global scale. But some of these martial arts influenced video games are so graphic they’re sick. This has to have a subliminal effect on the kids that are playing them.