Back to Basics with Whitney
As I was driving home from class tonight, I couldn’t help but think of that Whitney Houston song from many years ago. You know the one, because you’ve probably had a singing session with it in the shower or car at some point when you were sure no one was listening. Don’t deny it; I know I can’t be the only one.
"I have nothing, nothing, nothing. . . if I don’t have you-oooo-oooo."
You know. Don’t act like you don’t.
No, I’m not getting all weepy over my husband or even my karate teachers or school. Instead of "have," I thought it rather appropriate to replace that word with "know."
"I know nothing, nothing, nothing. . . . DON’T. MAKE. ME. DO-ooh one more KATA! I don’t want to find another PROBLEM! Stay in my COMFORT ZONE-if you dare, or must I just imagine myself there. . . "
In case you’re wondering if all my life moments have a mental soundtrack that goes with them. . . yes, most do.
I asked my instructor a couple weeks ago if she would watch me do all my material, every kata I’m supposed to know up to this point, so that she could pick it apart. I wanted her help to nit-pick starting now, so that a month before black belt testing, I’m not panicking because there are all of these little things that have been piling up.
One of the classes I go to is packed with white and yellow belts, so the black belt class (where it is often just me and one or two other people) is the right time and place to start working on all the little nuances. Tonight, it was just me and my instructor on the floor. I started with my first kata, Nai Hanchi Shodan. The suggestions came from my instructor and from a black belt who has been taking a break and was just observing from the back: widen nai hanchi stance, push the knees out more, make that strike parallel, make sure not to double block from the inside, the leg lift needs to be out in front, not on the inside, etc. etc. etc.
All this from a kata I thought I knew like the back of my hand.
I have so much to work on. I’m so glad I’m starting now.
"I know nothing, nothing, NOTHING. . ."
In the beginning
Thanks to Dani and Becky for submitting questions. Man, either my blog is an open book and you know everything you ever wanted to about me, or you just don’t care to know any more. Either way, it’s all good. I answered Becky’s question via email. Dani’s could be an entire book. . .
Dani posed this question: What inspired/motivated you to start karate, and what inspires you to continue?
When I was growing up, I always thought it would be cool to know karate. I thought that you went to a karate school and you learned all kinds of secret things, like if you push your finger on a person’s knee at just the right spot, they would fall over in pain and die.
The problem was that I was so busy with field hockey, softball, athletic training, student council, french club, ping-pong club (yes you heard me correctly), lousy boyfriends, playing the saxophone, etc. etc. etc. that I really didn’t have time to even look into the possibility of taking karate classes. I didn’t know a single person who took karate and I knew next to nothing about it.
When I went to college, I was required to take physical education credits. Karate was an option and I was very interested in taking the course. But then I heard that the final exam for the class was walking through the streets of Pittsburgh and being randomly attacked by people they had throughout the streets and that scared the living daylights out of me. Instead, I took a life guarding refresher class so I would be able to have a cool job the next summer, and then followed that with a dance class that I failed (That’s an entirely different post).
As a volunteer PEER Educator on my college campus, I spoke to many people about rape and sexual assault through those years. Every once in a while we would have seminars on campus where we would bring in these awesome martial artists who would do demonstrations on fighting off knife attacks, gun attacks and other unpleasantries. I thought it was so cool, but I was really busy with college classes, work, and Mr. BBM. So, I continued my years in college hearing about these karate classes and wanting to take them so badly, but I was just too busy and honestly too afraid. I bought a big can of mace instead.
There were a great many years that followed college: grad school, moving to DE, moving to PA, moving to NJ, moving back to PA and I never even gave karate a thought.
Then I had Big I.
I always had these things I like to call "action plans." I think about a potentially bad scenario like a fire in my house or an attacker in a parking lot and I create a plan in my head as to what I would do. Some people might call that a mental illness; I call it being prepared. For as long as I can remember, I have always thought about these types of things.
I began thinking about them more and more after I had my first daughter. What if someone attacked me while I was putting her in her car seat? What if someone tried to take my daughter?
Then my husband took a job where he was traveling constantly and my mental illness action plans took on a whole new life. I walked through parking lots with my keys sticking out between my fingers; I formulated plans for a break-in when I was by myself with the baby. I felt scared and powerless and I didn’t like it one bit.
When Big I turned three she wanted to go to Princess Camp. It was a summer full of princess activities and her friend/neighbor wanted to go as well. Each week, we would go early and watch Big I’s friend take karate classes before we would eat dinner and the girls would take Princess Camp. Big I loved watching her friend wear sparring gear and learn to kick and punch.
It was at the end of one of these classes that the instructors came out and started talking to all the observers and parents. Apparently, the dance school was growing and they didn’t have room for the karate classes anymore. I was disappointed because Big I had just started expressing an interest in starting karate and I was more than happy to switch out Princess Camp for Karate.
To make a long conversation short, I found out about my dojo through the instructors and a group of us decided that we would enroll our kids in the karate school and that we, the parents, would also start classes. We began as a great group with three families, each with one kid taking karate. Now, Big I and I are the only ones left from our group.
Karate sort of fell into my lap. I’d always had this interest, but it wasn’t something I sought out. It sort of found me at just the right time. Karate helps me create workable action plans, feel more confident, and it keeps me centered in a way I never imagined it would or could. I wanted to take karate for so many reasons, but the reason that I continue to go and be motivated today is because karate has become such a huge part of who I am and who I want to be.
I get lots of hits on this site from people searching for the fastest way to a black belt and the styles with the least amount of requirements to get to black belt. It really surprises me because when I started I never imagined I’d be anywhere close to getting a black belt. That was never why I started. When I first started going I thought that it would be really cool if I could become a green belt some day. I didn’t know what being a green belt meant. Heck, I didn’t know what being a white belt meant. All I knew is that I felt pretty cool when I ran in to the pizza shop to pick up a pie wearing my gi.
It’s funny because as a white belt I knew how to get out of a basic wrist grab and I thought I was invincible. I wanted to flaunt that I took karate. I remember that when our group got our yellow belts, we wanted to wear them out in public. We felt all big and bad. Now, I don’t wear my gi anywhere unless it’s just to run into the store quickly. And I never wear the gi jacket, only the pants. I figure most people probably just think I’m wearing scrubs anyway. I don’t flaunt it because I don’t want to invite trouble, and because I don’t have to wear my gi to show my karate anymore. It comes from within, and the knowledge and confidence that I’ve developed from karate is just a part of me now, not defined by some exterior uniform or color on a belt.
When I miss a class or two (like this week since I’ve decided to keep my germs to myself), things don’t feel right. Even when we’re working on something intimidating like blindfolded self defense, I leave the dojo afterwards feeling refreshed and calm. I can’t imagine not doing karate. I think I will probably be one of those 80-year old women still doing kata and showing kids how its done. At least, that’s what I hope I’ll be some day, a long time from now.
I started karate to calm the action plans; but I continue because it’s who I am and I can’t imagine my life without it.
Nothing
I have been ridiculously sick since the weekend. The only way it is possible for me to not go through a box of tissues every five minutes is if I take cold medicine. I don’t do well on cold medicine at all. Even if I take the child’s dose, cold medicine equals coma for me.
Apparently Benadryl also kills creative juices because I have absolutely nothing to say, unless of course you’d like to hear about how many tissues I’ve been through in the past few days or the fact that I could really use someone to flip the covers on and off me at 5-minute intervals throughout the night because the chills/hot flashes are coming at about that frequency.
Yes, it has been a fun week. I am almost completely convinced that Lil C’s allergic reaction gave me such stress that it sent me spiraling into a sinus infection/flu/allergy nightmare. (She is now 100% fine by the way, and thank you for all your reassuring comments and concern.)
I’ve noticed a lot of bloggers opening up the floor and asking readers what they’d like to know. So since I am lacking any and all material this week and since karate class is looking like it won’t be happening this week, I invite you to pose a question to Black Belt Mama. I can’t guarantee I’ll answer them all, and I really can’t guarantee that I’ll even remember writing this post because, well, Benadryl. But if there’s something you’re dying to know, ask away in the comments section or email me at bbm at blackbeltmama dot com. I’ll answer the questions in an upcoming post.
And please, ask me something because I really don’t want to have to, in a Benadryl induced semi-conscious state, create questions to answer because you were all too lazy to help me out. In the interest of me not having to create my own pathetic questions, I’ll provide links to your blog if you ask one. So ask away. . .
And that about does it for today. Where’s my Benadryl?
Scary Day
Lil C had what appears to be a severe allergic reaction to an antibiotic she was on for an ear infection. She started with a couple hive-like bumps on her legs. Today, the few small hives erupted into a full fledged all out attack on her joints. Lil C’s knees swelled to about four times their normal size. Her wrists, fingers, ankles, and toes were swollen too. She had hives everywhere from the top of her little head to the tops of her little feet.
I talked to my Mom this morning and told her I was concerned. I didn’t want to be an alarmist though so I thought I would give her a bath and see how she was. It was when I started undressing her that I saw how much worse it had gotten in only an hour. I immediately called the doctor, and then drove her frantically as fast as I could to the appointment.
As the doctor asked me questions about whether or not rheumatoid arthritis or Lupus runs in our family, it was all I could do not to cry. It was terrifying to watch her swell up so severely, so suddenly. My Mom works for an allergist so I know how serious allergic reactions can be.
The doctor put her on oral steroids and round the clock benadryl and we’re supposed to watch her closely over the next 48 hours. Hopefully, an allergic reaction is all that is was and it will all go away. Tonight, she seems much better already.
I couldn’t help but think about the little girl Julia, whose battle with cancer I’ve been following over the past several months. My fear and panic today is probably only a fraction of what her mother feels every single day, and has been feeling every day since her daughter first got sick. I pray for that little girl every single night, but I’m going to make sure I remember her family in my prayers as well.
It was an absolutely terrifying day. I hope that this ordeal is over and that we won’t have any more incidents like this ever again.
Update: As of Sunday night, Lil C is doing much better. Her joint swelling is pretty much gone. We’re still dealing with an occasional hive popping up here and there, some itchy eyes, and some minor bruising under the skin where the swelling was the most severe. But it appears that we are out of the woods for now and that is a HUGE relief.
BBM Challenge is BACK!
I started the BBM Challenge and then didn’t post about it often enough at all. It seems to have been dying a slow death. Well, the BBM Challenge was never gone; but now it’s back in full force. My family and I have been sparring over the past few months when we get the chance to do so (I know, so lame, because we need to make it a priority). When I say "family," I mean FAMILY, as in all of us.
Lil C’s favorite thing these days is to demand that things be put "ON" and she demanded the same of my sparring gear. I’ve been trying to teach her how to punch and do knife hands. The knife hands are coming along nicely, and she can even throw a decent little snap kick (mostly when getting her diaper changed). By far though, her best karate skill is the kiai, which is awesome! She also does a fairly nice growl, which will come in handy as well.
And when she’s not growling, kicking, or kiaiing. . . sparring gear helps to create a fabulous game of Peek-a-Boo.
Here she is asking where her next opponent is, as she had already taken Dada down to the ground. And speaking of taking Dada down, the last time that Mr. BBM and I sparred, I felt like I made some real improvement.
If you’re a martial artist and you want to improve your sparring skills, you need to read Living the Martial Way. There are some excellent tips in that book for how to improve your sparring skills. I also think that karate camp was a huge help to me. Despite the agony of the kicking drills session, I was able to take a lot of good information away from that session. Without going into too much detail, the most important thing I learned in that session is to get out of the way. It sounds simple but when you’re sparring in a controlled environment, it’s easy to be concentrating on your next move so much that you let your body get in the way of a kick or two.
The last time I sparred, I felt like I had improved greatly as far as quickness and retaliating against a kick goes. I think Mr. BBM would probably agree with that assessment because it wasn’t long into our session before he was telling me that his head hurt and he didn’t feel good (i.e. excuses for why my wife is kicking my butt).
Instead of just making improvements in sparring my goal, I have added abdominal exercises to the routine daily (and have stuck with it for the past 2-3 weeks now), an exercise that Mr. BBM tells me will improve total body toning (sort of like a squat that explodes up into raising the weights over your head and back down again), push-ups (which truthfully aren’t happening as often as they should because I hate, hate, hate them), and other light weight-lifting.
So, with about three months to go until the BBM family hits the beach, we are in full BBM Challenge mode here and I invite you to do the same. Pick up your challenge where you left off, or feel free to join for the first time. If you’d like to create a fitness or other type of goal and be added to the Challenge blogroll, just shoot me an email or leave a comment and I’ll send you the button and code. . . the more the merrier.
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