May 10, 2006

McNuggets equals Motivation?

Big I is much more interested in her acting class than her karate class lately. In fact, she’s so interested in her acting class, that her karate class is paling in comparison, as in "NOOOOO! I don’t want to go to karate today." My husband made a deal with her; one that I wasn’t particularly crazy about. In fact, I’m still kind of wondering what we should do about this whole anti-karate attitude she’s got going lately. His deal is simple: quit karate-no more McDonald’s. Continue with karate-go to McDonald’s. For the child that walks around this house singing "Ba, Ba, Ba, Ba Bah. . . I’m lovin’ it," this has been quite a conundrum.

Today she asked me about the details of this little arrangement, as in "What do I have to do so I can quit karate and still go to McDonald’s?" I told her the solution is simple: become a black belt, Sensei Big I, and then you can do whatever you want. If you want to quit, quit. You can still go to McDonald’s. Her eyes lit up. She said, "REALLY, MOMMY???? REALLY? You mean IT?" I said, "Yep, all you have to do is get a black belt. The fastest way to do that is to go to class and learn as much as you can, and practice." She was so excited about the idea of not going to karate and still being able to go to McDonald’s that she kissed me, hugged me and squealed "THANK YOU MOMMY!"

Does she think they just hand out black belts; or does she not realize the work involved? I think it’s definitely the latter. Once she does realize what she’s agreed to, I can just see her taking a black permanent marker to that milky white belt of hers. She is quite the little artist.

I know that Big I doesn’t get the big picture yet. I know that she doesn’t understand or appreciate the Martial Arts the way that I do. She started when she was 3.5 years old though and she’s only now 5. Right now, all I want is for her to go and let it sink in slowly. I’m hoping the appreciation part will follow.

For me, I’ve had a respect for it from the beginning. I like the challenge of a new kata and feel empowered when I learn new self defense techniques. Learning karate and kobudo has done wonders for my confidence. I’m in it for the long haul and see the black belt as the first of many promotions I hope to one day attain. I want that black belt, not for the color or for the bragging rights. I want that black belt because I want the knowledge and confidence that (I think) comes along with it. I enjoy going to class when there are students who outrank me. I feel that I really learn from them. Most students are more than happy to help you out regardless of age or rank.

The annoying part about the Martial Arts is that there are definitely people who are only at the dojo for the bragging rights. They are there, not for a personal journey and accomplishment, but for the belt itself. These are the students who memorize the moves but have no power behind their punches, no purpose in their learning. These are the students who get frustrated when going over the first kata for a new student who has joined the class, or for someone who needs or wants to review. They don’t see the value in review. They want to learn their kata, their material. Just like students who cram for tests and quickly forget the material afterwards, these martial arts students are the same. They don’t take each kata and make it their own. They don’t see the bunkai (application) in the kata or care to learn it. They only want to do the bare minimum that it takes to move on, get the next stripe, get the next belt.

Kindergarten orientation proved that karate has had some benefits for Big I. A child who lacked self-confidence would not have dealt so well with a little adversity. My husband and I agree that she should stick it out, at least for now. I sincerely hope that our little McDonald’s deal with Big I doesn’t backfire and make her into one of the types of students that annoy me. I am hoping that she’ll see the meaning in it, that eventually she’ll be intrinsically motivated to learn and want to continue to learn. But for right now, it’s all about the Happy Meals.