March 8, 2006

Missed a Season

I was pregnant starting January of 2005. My spring/summer and early fall wardrobe consisted of oh so flattering maternity clothes (seriously, who am I kidding?). This was my second pregnancy and I know from the first one what a hit your wardrobe takes after missing the styles of last season. My wardrobe is lacking. . .my capri’s are all the wrong length apparently and frankly, I’m wondering how I’m going to pull off spring in general. Men’s styles just don’t change that often; they really should be the ones having the children. Women miss one season and as Heidi Klum of Project Runway would say, "You’re out!" So, tonight, I was trying to be "in."

For my birthday in February, my Mom gave me a new Vera Bradley backpack in one of the new spring colors, Java Blue. I love it, but how great is the bag if you’re wearing warm up pants and sneakers with it? So, my mission was to go to Old Navy since my gift card was burning a hole in my new bag and see what I could find.

Going shopping for clothing for yourself after having a baby is sort of like visiting a foreign country. All of the styles look a little off to you, and you feel like you’re in a strange and unfamiliar land. You also start to wonder if you’re just too damn old to be dressing like those "Daddy O" girls on the commercials. It’s also challenging when you have your two children and slightly disgruntled husband along for the ride, especially when there is so much ADORABLE children’s clothing. But, I looked at the kids clothing only briefly and promptly turned my back in search of my new fashion forward spring/summer wardrobe.

I went off to the dressing room with two skirts, four tanks and a sweater set. I was trying desperately to not be "me." I tried the same thing at the Clinique counter a few weeks ago and ended up buying a crap load of make-up that makes me look more like I should be working the streets than preparing for visits to the park with my girls. Anyway, that’s another story. I also took my 4-year old to the dressing room with me because she is brutally honest. Did I mention we went there after karate so we were both wearing our gi pants? (Picture white droopy poopy pants and you have a pretty accurate description.) The teen workers stationed in the dressing room were probably having the time of their life.

So, the skirts went well, so well in fact that I had to ask the girl working there exactly where on my waist/hip area the skirt was supposed to sit. This experience was sort of reminiscent of the Justin Timberlake concert I attended a few years back with my husband. (Yeah, I know, get your laughs out now.) I could not for the life of me understand what the heck the opening band called themselves, so I casually leaned over to the teenager beside me and asked her who they were. She looked at me like I was a complete loon when I coolly asked her if they were the "LMP’s" because that’s what it sounded like! Turns out they were the Black Eyed Peas. Who knew? They really should speak more clearly. Anyway, my Old Navy helper teen determined that I needed a smaller size and I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I stepped back in shock and awe, touched my chest and exclaimed, "Wow! Really?" as her helper teen went to retrieve my smaller size. My daughter said I looked "beautiful," and I knew they were both keepers. On to the tanks. . .

You know this whole layering look? I tried it and I bought two tanks (color coordinated with my new bag although I will NEVER admit to anyone who asks if I did that on purpose.) I don’t know if I’ll actually wear them layered. My daughter looked a little puzzled and said to me, "Mommy, why did you put that shirt on top of the other one? Did you just not feel like taking the first one off?" It’s hard to explain to a 4-year old that you’re trying to be "cool," so I didn’t try. I just said, "yes," and moved right along to the sweater set.

The sweater set was great and I bought it too. I bought it because I only own about 200 sweater sets right now and I could not live without this shade of blue. So, I will probably wear it with my wrong length capri’s and sneakers and decide not to leave the house in it until its sandal weather. This is what happens to me every spring. . . fashion dementia. This spring, it is multiplied because of the whole baby issue. I’ve been wondering why they don’t have a "Gymboree" for mommy’s so that we could be all coordinated and adorable the way our kids always are.

Oh well, at least my girls always look cute; and maybe I’ll decide to brave my new looks out of the house by the end of summer. For now, the tags are staying on until I make up my mind.