July 11, 2007

The Bubble Lady and the Shhher

At my local mall, there is a woman who works in a department store shoe department. She has worked there for decades now, and that’s not the only thing that has stayed the same. When I was a little girl, my Mom would take my sister and me to the department store; and while my Mom tried on shoes, the bubble lady blew bubbles from a bottle and wand that she wore around her neck. I adored that lady. There’s just something exciting about blowing bubbles in a department store when you’re a kid.

Today, Lil C and I were roaming the mall while waiting for Big I’s reading class to finish up. Because Lil C has long abandoned her love for the stroller, I brought along her little push car and it was working perfectly right up until it wasn’t. Lil C was standing there in the mall, walking the opposite direction almost constantly, and I was trying to get her back in her car. She wasn’t behaving badly, just being a typical one year old, wanting to assert some control over her shopping decisions.

And that’s when, out of nowhere, the bubble lady appeared. "Here," she said, "I’ll blow bubbles over the car and I bet she’ll sit for you." There, in the middle of the mall, the bubble lady worked her magic, blowing bubbles for Lil C until she was mesmerized. After a minute of bubble-induced happiness, Lil C was more than willing to get back in her car. I was elated; but the bubble lady didn’t stop there. To encourage Lil C to continue sitting in her chair, she got out a sheet of frog stickers and handed those over. We began putting the frog stickers on her car and she was thrilled.

"You know," I said to the bubble lady, "you used to blow bubbles for me when I was a kid." She laughed and said, "Really?" and I continued to tell her how much I had loved her as a kid and how much more I love her now as a parent. I truly believe there is a special place in heaven for the bubble lady, because anyone who helps a woman entertain her child and get more shoes in the process is truly a very special person.

Contrast this with the very rude shher in my daughter’s reading class only an hour later. I was feeling happy with the world after my encounter with the bubble lady. Lil C and I left the mall and went to pick up Big I. Parents are supposed to attend the last 10-15 minutes of class to hear what the homework is for the following week and get tips from the teacher. I arrived about five minutes before I needed to be there, because I wanted to make sure I was on time. I stood outside the closed door with Lil C and was going to wait until it was the exact time. The reading teacher smiled, and waved us both in.

Lil C and I went in and took a seat in the back of the classroom. Lil C is a talker. She was sitting on my lap and running through her inventory of favorite things: "Mommy, Dada, Big I (o.k. she doesn’t really call her Big I but I’m not telling her real name)". I quietly told her to whisper and then occupied her with looking at the pictures and credit cards in my wallet. She preferred the credit cards.

While this was going on, the kids were playing a game to end class. They were divided into two teams. The room wasn’t exactly quiet to begin with. And then, out of nowhere, came this loud "SHHHHHH." And again, "SHHHHHH," and on this second Shh, I whipped my head around to see one of the father’s Shhing me and my daughter from across the room. Being the involved parent that he is, he sits in the back of the classroom each week, apart from his daughter, busy with his own reading. At least when I was able to participate (when I had a sitter for Lil C) I was involved in her learning.

If you’ve been reading here for a while you know that I am not the type to be Shhhed. And don’t even think about SHHing my children. Seriously not cool. So, when I whipped my head around, I couldn’t help myself. I gave him a look that could easily put him 6 feet under and mouthed the exaggerated words "I. AM. TRYING. SHUT. YOUR. MOUTH."

I don’t think he was expecting that response from me. I think he thought I would rush Lil C out of the classroom, because God forbid Lil C or I interrupt the group game (which we weren’t doing anyway). I continued to look at him like I wanted to rip his head off, and he sheepishly looked down and away.

After class I stood around and waited to see if he would say something to me. I wanted him to, because I really wanted to tell him that he needs to mind his own business, and that if he ever thinks about Shhing me or my child again, he should strongly reconsider since I may need to then shush him. He instead looked intimidated and steered very clear of me.

I didn’t do anything wrong. I never would have even walked in that classroom with Lil C had the teacher not told me to do so. AND, it wasn’t like she was screaming in the background or even being loud for that matter. She was just talking occasionally in her normal voice. The Shhing was completely unwarranted.

Afterward I thought about the contrast between these two people. One sees a young child and decides to make her day (and therefore her mother’s); the other sees a young child and decides to reprimand for no reason and try (notice I said "try") to make the mother feel about two inches tall. It made me think about many different aspects of my life, and how the good and the bad are just inherent in life. I guess to really appreciate the good people in your life, you have to encounter some not so great people. Likewise, the unfortunate or bad things that happen in life, make the good moments and experiences that much sweeter.