The Dreaded Christmas Letter
Hello, BBM Readers! I am delighted to be writing my first blog entry ever while BBM recovers. I have to be honest and tell you that I think this whole "ACL" thing is just a ploy by BBM to get me to start blogging. She’s been harrassing me suggesting to me to write for awhile now. Because she knows I will help her in any way I can, she conveniently "tore her ACL" and needed "surgery." Then, she begged me to help fill the blog void while she was gone. Good one, BBM! You finally got your way! Seriously, though, I’m excited to be writing here. Be gentle with me, dear reader; it is, after all, my first time.
The Dreaded Christmas Letter
by Tkddaughter
It is that time of year when you finally are excited to go to the mailbox. In between the thousands of credit card offers, magazines and bills, you actually get fun mail. You know the kind with cute stamps and little snowmen on the envelopes. It is the time of year where you can reconnect with friends you haven’t seen in years and years. But along with that fun mail comes much controversy…da da DA!!!!! THE DREADED CHRISTMAS LETTER!
You know how it goes…Little Susie started preschool this year and she is already working on quantum phsyics. Johnny Jr. is the starting quarterback for his peewee football team and we hear the Steelers are looking to sign him. Our dog, Snickers, just landed his 10th doggie commercial! Blah blah blah. By the time Christmas finally gets here, you feel incompetent, unworthy, and simple. I’ve already felt the stress of it myself. It’s annoying. At times it’s painful. And you know what? I’m glad they sent the letter.
I’m glad they sent the letter because what I dislike even more than the dreaded Christmas letter is the beautiful Christmas card showing no signs of a human’s touch. Or one that only bears the inscription, "Merry Christmas from the Smiths." I haven’t seen you in 17 years and the best you can come up with is, "Merry Christmas from the Smiths???" Are you kidding me?! I want to hear the growing your family has done during this past year. I want to know a little bit of what you do each day and how you’ve changed. Who is this person you’ve become? I can’t get that from a photo card printed out for you.
So while so many people dread the family Christmas letter, I say do it. Send it out. Tell your Christmas card list what you are up to, what the last year has shown you, and how you’ve grown. Send less cards if you have to, but write a little hello to each person. And a little advice: be honest. Don’t exaggerate to make your family sound like the perfect family. Tell it like it is because let’s face it…we’re all in the trenches here and it’s nice to know we are not alone.
That being said…well, I didn’t send a Christmas letter this year, but I did hand-make all 75 of our Christmas cards. While I didn’t write about our past year, I did put my own personal touch on it. But I bet there are still a few people out there who got my card and thought, "Gee, that’s nice, but what have they been up to this past year?"
For BBM, From the Okinawa Kenpo Side
Hello BBM Readers! It is my privilege to write for BBM today while she is going through her recovery. I’m sure all of our well wishes are with her!
Just as a quick note – this post will not contain any information about underwear or pimped out crutches; those things are specialties of BBM and I couldn’t possibly encroach on her territory (not to mention I might incur the BBM wrath). But what I WILL try to do is offer something useful in the karate realm.
Holding True with a Wandering Mind
Matthew Apsokardu
One concept I keep running into during my training is balance. Some say yin and yang, others say in and yo. But basically it boils down to giving two opposing forces their fair share. If I train my right hand, I should train my left hand. If I practice punches, I should practice kicks. If I develop my body, I should develop my spirit. You can see how infinite these little examples can be (10,000 conflicts, the Japanese might say). But there is one kind of balance that has struck me lately and I would like to investigate it………
Have you ever found yourself puzzling over a tough math equation, but continuously getting stuck? How about trying to brainstorm an English paper (especially when it’s due the next day), but suffering from crampy writer’s block? I think we’ve all felt the hair tugging frustration these situations invoke. At these moments, it’s likely you do what most people do – get up and give yourself some breathing space. Let your brain air out. And when you sit back down, the problem at hand looks completely different, and not so terrible.
I believe the same can be true for karate.
In general, martial arts training is very gung-ho. We tend to go full-out, 110%. And that’s a good thing. Without that kind of commitment it’s impossible to become truly great at anything. But in karate, just like with the math equation, it’s very easy to run into seemingly insurmountable problems. However, UNLIKE the math equation, many karate practitioners have a hard time stepping back. They feel discouraged at their lack of progress and try to push their material harder and harder.
Consider this visual –
This unfortunate karateka keeps running headlong into that beautifully crafted brick wall. He’s a karate man, so he should be able to pound through it, right? Well…maybe, but what happens if he relaxes for a moment and let’s his mind wrap around the situation –
Look at that! Ohh he’s a quick one.
Seems silly and intuitive, I know. But I actually poke fun at MYSELF with these pictures because it wasn’t until recently when I took a step back from karate that I began to see it in a whole new light. I noticed many awkward, unnatural things I was doing, and how easily I could improve myself. Also, certain solidified concepts in my mind began to merge with floating ideas that I developed outside the dojo. Such combinations would not have occurred without a little bit of distance.
My budo instructor has a saying – "Sometimes martial arts can be like rolling down a train track with blinders on. It’s very easy to chug along, always straight ahead."
I’m tending to agree, more and more. I believe a practitioner should train hard and chip away at all their imperfections, but also take time to step back. Refocus. Reconsider things, especially after they’ve become stagnant with repetition. I’d like to quote another great instructor who has a newsletter called Okinawa No Shorin-Ryu Karate-do Kenkyu-Kai Shimbun. In it, he says – "When the young study karate it is ok for it to be recreational, but, when more mature practitioners train it should be re-creational."
MA
—————————————-
A Final thought – Some people are given bad situations like BBM – she is forced into a training hiatus due to surgery. But just imagine the amazing opportunity she will have to really examine the way she learns and the way her body changes (especially in mobility) as time passes.
It’s Trans-Atlantic Funtime Wednesday!
Hiya folks, I guess I’d better do a little intro for you all. My name’s Adam, and as the post title may have given away, I live all the way over the ocean in Britain. England to be specific. Cornwall, England to be even more specific. In fact, if you really want to get down to it, you can see where I live right here. In between periodically updating my blog and writing the odd review or two, I train in the Korean art of Tang Soo Do. It’s not so common over here, in fact you’re more likely to find it in the States, but it’s essentially a Korean take on Okinawan Karate. I’ve just graded for fourth Gup, and I’m currently facing the slowly dawning realisation that Dan grading is looming on the horizon. And of course, I’m somewhere between 5 and 8 hours ahead of the majority of readers here. By my reckoning that effectively gives me the power of time travel, I can even tell you what happens at dinnertime today!
BBM has kindly asked me to guest post here today, but under the strict condition that I do it with my underwear on. But what to write about? It’s quite a daunting prospect going from my own very modest readership, where literally tens of people are party to the innermost workings of my frazzled brain, to taking the stage here. BBM has a reputation (so I hear) to uphold. So do I go with an embarrassing tale of my own ineptitude, a stirring recollection of something martial arts related, or maybe something thought-provoking and profound? I think something approaching the first one is the most likely.
So I’ve been a busy chap lately, preparing gifts and presents to go all over the place for this festive time of year. One of my little packages had to find its way to the United States, so being the clever chap I am I figure I’ll get it sorted and off as smoothly as a buttered weasel. Off I went to the local shops to find the bits and pieces I wanted, a nice card and a big padded envelope to put it all in. I found out that I’d need a Customs label to send goods outside of the EU, with the contents clearly marked on the outside – so much for the surprise! I went to the Post Office website to get me one of these labels and be super-efficient – no faffing about in the queue for me! However, I notice on the site a note about sending food (part of the package I was sending was edible) to the USA. As I read, more and more obstacles, hurdles and red tape make themselves apparent.
Following the first link, I come across the FDA website. It seems with the high levels of alert and utter panic after various terrorist attacks, food and drink is subject to some pretty strict legislation if you want to get it sent to the USA. I dutifully followed the instructions, page after page after page. Form after form after form. Who am I? Who is the recipient? What am I sending? What’s it made of? How much of it is there? Who made it? Where is that company based? On and on the questions went, but it’s of no matter to By-the-books Man! This package needs to get there and by Jingo I’m going to make sure it does! An hour or so later and I’m done, all I need to do now is wait for my reference number to arrive to put on the Customs label. I wait. And wait. And wait. After about another hour I decide to have another look at the Post Office site, just on the off-chance I’d missed something. This time I don’t click on the first link in the text, and actually finish reading the information. The same piece of information which tells me "If you’re sending a gift, there’s no need to do any of that FDA malarkey as long as it’s marked as a gift on the label" (I’m paraphrasing)…… If I wasn’t so annoyed at myself for not having read it properly in the first place, I could’ve screamed.
Yeah I know I’m mixing tenses a lot here, just bear with me. It won’t last too much longer I promise.
After a cup of tea, half an hour’s rest and repeatedly calling myself every name under the sun, it was time to package it all up and go and post it. Except of course, it doesn’t all fit in the envelope…. Deep breath Adam, we’ll just nip up to the little shop up the road and get another. Oops, all sold out. One annoying drive later, testing both my tolerance and skills of avoiding holiday-driving idiots, all desperate to make that extra second of difference to their journey, and I’m at the Post Office. Naturally at this time of year there’s quite a queue, a queue I can’t quite see the end of thanks to the curvature of the Earth. Cue more waiting. By the time I got to the front of the line I’d grown a full beard, but I’d made it! It ended up costing nearly as much to send as the value of the contents, but that’s irrelevant, I’d succeeded!
It might seem like a bit of an odd story to use to fuel my one and only guest post here, but I think it’s representative of just how much stress the most seemingly simple task can cause at this time of year. It’s no wonder we enjoy the festive break so much, it’s the reward for successfully getting gifts to the people who matter. Some people are content with giving a simple random DVD from the Top 20 or similar, but I like to put a bit of thought into mine. Something which makes the recipient stop and think ‘wow’ or ‘oh yeah’ when they open it. The look on their face or their reaction, that’s my little present to myself :).
With any luck you’ll not need another post from me on here, not under the same circumstances anyway. Thanks for the podium for a day, and get well soon BBM, we miss you.
Adam.
*** There’s a new review up today on The BBM Review. BBM may be out of commission herself, but her word-grinding minions are still working hard for her. If you fancy learning something new, check out the SuTree.com website review, you’ll be glad you did. ***
Self Defense for the Road Warrior
Hello everyone, this is John Vesia from Martial Views. BBM asked me to contribute something here while she’s mending herself after her ACL surgery. I’m flattered that she considered me for the task and I’m going to do my best to oblige. Enjoy!
What pushes your buttons? For many, it’s the (mis) behavior of certain types of drivers. The somewhat anonymous nature of driving combined with reckless tendencies can create a fertile ground for mindless road confrontations that can get pretty ugly (OK, that’s an oxymoron). The real tragedy is that the majority of times these events are totally avoidable. In the martial arts the best stratagems are borne of preventive measures, not some block-and-strike techniques.
If somebody is bent on cutting in front of you, let them have their way and give them plenty of room. Don’t tailgate. If an offensive driver attempts to engage you in some way, avoid eye contact, don’t make or return an obscene gesture or pull over to settle things. Road rage is always a lose-lose situation and judging from news reports it seems to be on the rise. All rageholics have adopted anger as a coping mechanism. They see flipping out as not only cathartic but justifiable. They lack compunction and common sense, but above all they’re dangerous. As long as you’ve developed the habits of a cautious and courteous driver you’re halfway home. If you do find yourself in the presence of a road rager, use a calm demeanor as an antidote to diffuse the situation.
Road rage is the result of aggressive driving, so it’s the latter we need to be cognizant of. Here are three groups that I feel fall into the aggressive driving category:
18 – 26 year old males
Cabbies and bus drivers (especially from New York)
Almost anyone on a Ninja motorcycle
Of course there are responsible drivers that fall under these headings, I’m just basing this on my own experience. The first group is a verifiable statistic. If anyone has taken a cab in Manhattan, you know what I’m talking about. One night when I was driving home from work I had a pair of those 2-wheel Ninja rockets pass me on the Bronx River Parkway doing about 150 mph, and that’s no exaggeration. Actually the speedometers for those bikes go up to 200. Maybe 150 is just cruising for these guys.
The holiday season is here, and this can be an uptight and stressful time for many of us. People rushing to and from the crowded malls to take care of last minute shopping and office partygoers who may have had a few too many can contribute to a special (i.e. risky) kind of traffic on our roads. Some people can become extremely indignant when they’re behind the wheel, so watch out for these nuts. In summation, I’ll leave you with a piece of driving wisdom my father once shared with me: “Idiots have the right of way.”
TDA and feelings, a contradiction?
Who am I?: Hello. My name is Nathan Teodoro, and I blog at TDA Training, an eclectic amalgamation of martial arts training articles, links, and instructional videos. I love to training, and love to teach. My blog is an extension of my teaching. When I teach, I learn, and so I blog. Again, hi.
What am I doing here? When BBM humbly begged me to guest-blog for her, I was at a loss for what to post. BBM usually writes witty expositions on the events of the day, breaking down not only the details, but her feelings and stuff. At TDA Training, we don’t do feelings. We train. When we think we have a feeling coming across our nerve endings, we train that right out of ourselves. That’s the difference between a BBM and a TDA – feelings. She’s got them, we simulate them in training!
So, now that I am the temporary BBM, I will attempt this feeling thing, and see what happens. Commencing now, in no particular order, I am sharing some feelings!
Holiday travel: It bugs me when I have to fly for business, and the holiday travelers-who may have never flown-get in the security line and don’t have a boarding pass, or don’t know that they can’t pack large gourds of perfume (gifts) into their carry-on luggage, or don’t realize that metal is what sets off the metal detectors! Longer lines, I can deal with, lack of common sense makes we want to train on someone…
The “Christmas” controversy: I grow tired of the culture war, or the war on Christmas, or whatever you want to call it. The vast majority of Americans celebrate Christmas, whether they profess to be a believer in Christ at all. It’s what we call a tradition! I know atheists, Wiccens, Scientologists, and those of the Jewish and Muslim persuasion may sometimes be offended at our brazen displays of nominal or sincere Christianity, but so what! If I were any of the above (I’m not), I think I’d understand that most of the people in this country (I hear over 90%) celebrate these traditions, and I should just put up with it. Why is it that tolerance doesn’t go both ways. Truly religiously intolerant countries forbid, in many cases, the practice of any religion other than that of the state, or forbid practice at all (as in the former Soviet Union and other totalitarian states). I think most would agree that we tolerate those who are not of the majority religion here very well. I also get tired of hearing from those who always complain about the lack of tolerance for Christmas. There! How’s that for hypocrisy?
Blogging quality: BBM, Mokuren Dojo, and Karate Thoughts Blog are some of my favorite MA blogs because they are consistently good. And gracious. I can’t manage either at TDA. I can be good sometimes, and occasionally gracious, but never both. As Gordon at the The Blue Wave Taekwondo School has recently posted, time is so precious recently that I can’t always seem to get in a good post. Chris at Martial Development’s idea of careful research, then posting is an ideal I can’t live up to, so I don’t always try. My posting is based, many times, on an idea. For me, blogging consists of burst of “inspiration,” followed by some filler. I only try posting interesting filler, but it’s filler nonetheless. Oh, well.
The “Surge” is working. All should be happy that everyone wins except the “insurgents” (terrorists) and their supporters. America wins by following through on her commitment, innocent Iraqis win by winning the chance to establish a free society in the midst of a region of turmoil and tyranny. A proto-democracy in the midst of totalitarian theocracies. Neat.
On politics, I’m glad that VP Cheney isn’t running, and that we have a chance at fresh faces and fresh blood in the Executive. A chance…
Finally, on BBM: She has been one of the best friends to bloggers of all types. Based on the links and comments she gets to posts, I assume her blog draws everyone from moms, karate chicks (respectfully), IT geeks, martial arts instructors and students, and everyone in-between. I think she’s a phenomenon. Or, as some character in some movie said, “phenomenonon!” Someone raising little girls, blogging all night, and trying to earn her black belt. Wow. I just writing about training. How boring!
That’s it! Back to work!
BBM, get better soon. We need you!
Copyright
© Copyright 2006-2019 blackbeltmama dot com ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Follow Me
Blog Designed By
My Creations
Things You Could Care Less About
