January 27, 2008

So Now You’ll Know

The other day, I noticed I was getting a decent amount of traffic from Citizen of the Month. I went to investigate (always worried people are saying mean things about me) to find out that he’s a writer in LA and I just so happen to be a "current crush." I don’t need to tell you that he made my day.

He had this fun post up about not winning blogging awards and feeling left out, and set out to change all of that with this interviewing idea. Hoards of people commented and suddenly the Citizen of the Month had a part time job of assigning interviewers with interviewees. To be honest, I sort of forgot about it until I got a nice email from Dave.

Dave didn’t know my blog even existed before coming here to research and think up some interesting questions. His questions are as follows, and if you’ve been reading me for a while, I think you’ll find you’ll be getting some new information:

1. A quick perusal of your posts and background reveal your family life, adventures and challenges in martial arts, freelance and personal writing are the among many things that form the basis of your
enviable and rich life. Do you ever feel insecure (like many men) that your professional pursuits haven’t landed you a more conventional brand of success (like a CEO)?

What? You mean I’m not the CEO??? I actually consider myself to be the Supreme Ruler of Black Belt Mama which is way better than CEO, but anyway. . . in all seriousness, I used to answer the question "What do you want to be when you grow up?" with one word: rich. I’m not rich when it comes to money; but I am rich in other areas. I have two perfect little girls (Yes, I’m extremely biased and I’m also correct). I have a husband who loves me and this family, so much so that he’s made sacrifices for all of us by working twice as hard as many others so that I don’t have to work outside the home. We made a ton of sacrifices to get where we are, selling our home to move in with my parents for a year when I had my first baby and my husband needed to switch career paths so that we’d be able to begin again on only one income.

So no, I don’t feel insecure. Do I sometimes wish I had a bigger house, or that I was able to take more lavish vacations and buy whatever I want to buy? Absolutely. Who doesn’t wish that from time to time? I’ve been very fortunate though, that I’ve been able to stay home with my girls, write for fun (and sometimes for some money), work from home with jobs that allow me the freedom to be a SAHM and also have some adult interaction, and do something that I love. . . write. I think I have a fairly enviable life and I’m pretty proud of it, CEO or not.

2. You’re a great writer (in my amateur opinion). Are you obsessed over your site’s traffic and do you make a significant amount of cash from your blog?

I hate to admit this, but some days I check my site traffic before I get my kids breakfast. Obsessed doesn’t even begin to describe it. Sometimes I think I have a serious problem. I get super happy when someone new links to me or mentions me (as long as they’re not all like "I hate that BBM. She’s a . . . ". Then it’s not so great). But yes, totally obsessed. As far as the money issue goes, that depends on what you mean by significant? Could I buy a bunch of bananas with my blog revenue? Totally (Pretty cool, right?). Could I buy a new dress? Possibly, depending on the month and the designer. So "significant"? Not exactly, but I guess it all depends on what your definition of significant happens to be.

3. You never use your name in any post I could find but you freely publish your picture. Why the partial anonymity?

I guess I think of it this way. I only publish pictures of me on my site that I think are exceptionally good pictures of me. Do I look this way in real life on a regular basis? Puh-lease! Don’t make me laugh. So, I guess I figure no one will really recognize me. I don’t use my name on my site because I didn’t want former students googling me, getting together at reunions and saying things like "Did you see that Ms. B on the internet? Omigod, she’s like a blogger, y’all." I taught English people. While I try to adhere as much as possible to the standards I gave my students, it just doesn’t happen all the time.

Also, crazy stalker serial killer people. You know, general reasons.

4. You don’t swear, even at the drive through of McD’s when confronted with a bitchy worker. Do your parents read your blog or are you just that virtuous?

Do my parents read my blog? My parents have no understanding of my blog. I mean, they’ve been on it every once in a while if I’ve told them to go read something specifically. Maybe. When I tell them something cool about my blog like "I’m getting published" or "I got a paycheck from my blog" they sort of nod and look at each other in confusion. Truth be told, they probably have that "I can’t believe we paid X amount for college when all she’s going to do is change diapers and ‘blog’" conversation when I’m not around. You’ll need to keep in mind that pretty much every time my Mom wants to check her email, she calls me and asks me what she’s doing wrong when she can’t get on, and usually, she doesn’t have the computer on yet. Ok, it’s not that bad, but you get the idea.

Virtuous? No. I take full responsibility for Lil C saying s%&t the other day and when she gets mad, she sometimes says "damn it" because I do too. I also swear into a pillow at physical therapy when my PT is pushing my knee too far. I’m horrible when I’m mad too. Saying it is one thing though. Putting it down in writing? The big time swearing stuff? I don’t know. I guess my opinion on that is sort of like my Grandmother’s opinion on girls who drink out of beer bottles (which I do, but she doesn’t have to know about it). If you want to do so, that’s fine. I’ll probably laugh and enjoy it. It’s just not me, not here anyway.

5. I apologize for not being able to read your entire site, but is there a post where you’ve described using your martial arts skills to defend yourself?

No, actually there is not. I haven’t had the need to defend myself since I started taking karate. That doesn’t mean I didn’t need to before I started taking karate. I didn’t write about it here before, but I was on a date that went very wrong a long time ago. With no karate training what-so-ever, I beat the guy to a pulp. He deserved every kick, every punch and every elbow I threw at him that day. I got away completely unscathed; he wasn’t so lucky. Many people wonder whether or not they’ll be able to defend themselves when faced with a scary situation. I know I can.

I train because I wanted to learn karate and be better able to defend myself. I also truly believe that when you know your stuff, you carry yourself differently. People just know not to mess with you, sort of like the Jedi mind tricks. (Oh MY GOD! Did I just say that? Mr. BBM is getting to me. He’s seriously getting to me!)

6. I enjoyed one of your first posts, Butt Flinging "Ash Holes". A hilarious tale, in retrospect only, that
makes a parent a parent. I noticed your style and tone haven’t changed much compared to your more recent posts. Do you think your writing (style or content) has changed over the past couple years?

My style hasn’t changed much at all. At least I don’t think it has. I spent so many years writing that I think my style is what it is at this point. I refined it in college and it seems to remain steady. As far as content goes, things have changed around here a lot. The focus of this blog was always getting to shodan and beyond; but with this acl injury, surgery and rehab, the focus has really changed. It’s not so much about getting to the black belt test anymore. It’s more about learning how to walk again the right way and getting stronger. Overall, I think that the tone has changed and will continue to do so. This injury is forcing me to think about things and look at things in very different ways. I’m not quite sure where it’s all going yet, but hopefully you’ll all stick around for the ride.

7. We all love Neil, but after Citizen of the Month (and Dooce), what is your current favorite site on the web (doesn’t have to be a blog)?

I absolutely adore Karl of Secondhand Tryptophan. I "rented" a spot on his blog many months ago, which led to a coveted spot on his blog roll, a guest post, a video that no one can seem to forget, and a nice friendship as well. He just cracks me up. He has the ability to take the tiniest detail and make it so hilariously funny.

I’m a bit ashamed to admit it, but I also love MySpace. I know, I know, but when you can search by graduation year and lurk back on all your former students and see how they turned out, and confirm that you were completely right about so-and-so. . . it’s a guilty pleasure. What can I say? No one is perfect.

Thanks to Citizen of the Month for setting this up, and to Dave for coming up with some very thought-provoking questions!

***Don’t forget to enter the contest give-away over at The BBM Review. Check out the "My Fruit Roll-Ups" post and leave your comment before it’s too late. Make sure you check back often. We have some cool martial-arts related give-aways coming up in February!