October 30, 2007

Calm

Mr. BBM practically kicked me out of the house today. He knew I needed to get out. Today, Lil C used me as a human tissue on there separate occasions. She also took her own diaper off, sat on her little potty for a minute, and then forgot why she was sitting there, got up and peed on the floor. Later, she pooped, and before I could hobble around to get the stuff and change her, she shoved her hand down her diaper. I’ll leave it at that. It was a rough day.

So I took Big I to the dojo by myself. I crutched it up the stairs and began talking to the Kyoshi matriarch of the entire organization. She is the second highest ranking black belt in our organization with an 8th dan. We began talking about my knee, the options and all the women who are experiencing acl injuries in the martial arts (I’m the second one in the past few months in our organization).

For the first time since this happened, I felt a sense of calm. Talking to Kyoshi has that effect on you, and it certainly did for me. As class got underway, I chatted quietly with some of the parents. One of the women blew her acl out while playing softball and had surgery for it many years ago. She was sharing her experience with me. Another woman there has worked at the hospital with the Orthopedic doctors and she confirmed that I had made a good choice with the group I chose. It was like everyone there addressed and erased a little piece of worry that I had and helped it just melt away.

While sitting on the sidelines, I took the opportunity to really watch the way my instructor moves. I was able to watch Big I too. I joked with some of the other parents that we need to call in the guys from The Unit to rig us up with little ear pieces we can stick behind our kids ears so that we can communicate with them from the sidelines. "Bend your knees. Get into Seisan!" etc. etc.

At one point during class, my instructor talked about a friend of hers who had been in a terrible car accident. In bed with her injuries, she concentrated on doing the breathing from Sanchin, and it helped her recover faster. She talked about how her friend would practice the arm movements for kata and waza while in bed to pass the time and keep her techniques in her head, also to keep her sanity. She nodded in my direction.

I am so glad that I went to the dojo tonight. I felt peaceful and relaxed for the first time since I got this nasty injury. It was a nice change of pace. We’ll have to see how long I can keep the calm up.